I went to the doc's yesterday for follow up...checked out test results that just re-confirmed what we already know. Had my annual pap test..ladies don't forget yours. The one possitive foot note to the day was having realized that after she weighed me I had lost one whole lb. since last weigh in 2 weeks ago, wooo hooo . I wasn't really trying since I was told to make subtle changes for now etc.
I was talking to my mom lastnight and happen to tell her . She was all happy for me and went on to say "That's great honey, keep it up. One lb is one lb and a good start. Please don't look at 1lb in a negative way like some would. It's all in the mind set." I say I know , not to worry . She goes on to give me an example by saying......
"You must not look at it like losing a deck chair on the Queen Mary"............omg I almost pissed myself lmao.
Gotta love mom.
Tuesday, October 05, 2004
Sunday, October 03, 2004
SAY CHEESE
My daughter comes home from school about a month ago and says one of her classes wants them to do a career day with someone. She goes on to say that she really isn't into spending that day in her dads career, although a fine one as a carpenter , it's not an interest for her.
A shy smile appears on her face as she tells me she already has another idea. I assume she may want to spend the day in the lab with my partner Chris who is a chemist but before I voice my thought she adds..."Do you think aunt Brigitte would let me spend the day with her?"...I thought OMG what a great idea!!! Let me call my sister!!!
Anyone who knows me even just a little has heard me talk and/or brag about my sister. I am proud of her, what can I say. She has a pretty cool job. The one before this was right up there aswell, she was a freelance photographer for the Ottawa Citizen , National Post, Globe n Mail papers among others I can't remember. NOW though, my sister is one of 2 official photographers for the office of the PRIME MINISTER OF CANADA..(for the Americans out there it is the equivalent to your PRESIDENT)............ in other words, she and another are Paul Martins photographers so she gets to travel all over Canada and the world with him at any given time or just be anywhere he is including the parliament buildings. Let me just add that she didn't even apply for this job. She was called by the senior photogragher who had worked with her before , and asked by him if she was interested in doing the job. She will admit to having to think about it though, freelance is higher paying then a steady commitment but the experience and people of this job was something attractive indeed. A perfect example of a once in a lifetime meeting came this year when the Dalai-Lama came to Canada. Brigitte and another photographer were lucky enough to each shoot the other while shaking his holynesses hand. She sent us all a copy of the photo, herself with the Dalai_Lama. Pretty cool if you ask me.
So , I call my sister and tell her of my daughters school project. She is all for it, thinks it's a terrific idea. She has to ask permission ofcourse and get a security clearance for my daughter etc. Oh and did I mention my sister barely speakes french and my daughter doesn't speak english? My sister and daughter have met ofcourse but sis is from out west with the rest of my family. I transplanted myself to Quebec 20 years ago so I am perfectly bilingual now. My ex never spoke a word of english. Although both parents can speak french and had us speaking a somewhat baby french as toddlers. Being in english Canada and our parents divorsing, we stopped speaking french in the home after that. By the time I left home I pretty much forgot all the french I knew untill I had to relearn it in Quebec.
To get back to my sister, she isn't overly concerned about the language barrier. Everyone she works with is bilingual and she and Cléo are also pretty good at using hand signals and the few words they do know to be understood ..........hopefully.
We have a date. It has the all clear so my daughter Cléo gets to go for sure now. My sister chose a day that had some action in parliment . My daughter will be able to actually take her own picture of the PRIME MINISTER in parliment as he goes into the QUESTION PERIOD , she will be right next to the Press Core.. who are basically the media that normally covers all those things. That in itself will be pretty cool. It has already been arranged for my daughter to have her own official parlimentary pass with photo clipped to her like my sister has. Brigitte also chose oct because parliment reopens sessions so there will be ministers all over . She really hopes to show my daughter as much as she can and also give her lots of chances to take her own photos with a spare camera she has. I think my sister is as excited about it as Cléo is not to mention me lol. I am so thankful that my daughter has this opertunity all because her aunt has this cool job.
Cléo has to look like a professional on this day so we had to go shopping. We were very lucky to find a rather nice tailored suit at Walmart no less. Looks fab on her , black with fine satin black pinstripe in it. A black pair of leather loafers with a short heel that looks great with pants. She already had a nice crisp white blouse so all cost aproximately 100$ not bad considering. She also agreed to wearing the suit to school on the day of her career day presentation. When we got home and tryed the whole kit on I couldn't believe how grown up she looked. I think all moms get those OMG THATS MY LITTLE GIRL?(or BOY) flashes , those overwhelming feelings of pride combined with a fist to the abdomin kinda way? ....
The big day is in 2 weeks, OCT 18th. We have a 3 hr drive to my sister and her hubby's house on the sunday before . Cléo's first briefing of the next days scedule will be summarized that afternoon by the official translater (that would be me hehe) to be followed by a leizurely visit with Brigitte and Glen . Next morning early will be a rebriefing and hair consultation with hairdresser (that would be me again) then final inspection before heading out to her government appointed career day begins .......during which time I will biting all my nails off lol
I know it will be a great day for her and my sister. Regardless of the language barrier those 2 are so alike it's not funny. I will be giving you all an update when its all done and maybe have a few pics to share from that day aswell..........it will be called SAY CHEESE UPDATE..simple enough lol
A shy smile appears on her face as she tells me she already has another idea. I assume she may want to spend the day in the lab with my partner Chris who is a chemist but before I voice my thought she adds..."Do you think aunt Brigitte would let me spend the day with her?"...I thought OMG what a great idea!!! Let me call my sister!!!
Anyone who knows me even just a little has heard me talk and/or brag about my sister. I am proud of her, what can I say. She has a pretty cool job. The one before this was right up there aswell, she was a freelance photographer for the Ottawa Citizen , National Post, Globe n Mail papers among others I can't remember. NOW though, my sister is one of 2 official photographers for the office of the PRIME MINISTER OF CANADA..(for the Americans out there it is the equivalent to your PRESIDENT)............ in other words, she and another are Paul Martins photographers so she gets to travel all over Canada and the world with him at any given time or just be anywhere he is including the parliament buildings. Let me just add that she didn't even apply for this job. She was called by the senior photogragher who had worked with her before , and asked by him if she was interested in doing the job. She will admit to having to think about it though, freelance is higher paying then a steady commitment but the experience and people of this job was something attractive indeed. A perfect example of a once in a lifetime meeting came this year when the Dalai-Lama came to Canada. Brigitte and another photographer were lucky enough to each shoot the other while shaking his holynesses hand. She sent us all a copy of the photo, herself with the Dalai_Lama. Pretty cool if you ask me.
So , I call my sister and tell her of my daughters school project. She is all for it, thinks it's a terrific idea. She has to ask permission ofcourse and get a security clearance for my daughter etc. Oh and did I mention my sister barely speakes french and my daughter doesn't speak english? My sister and daughter have met ofcourse but sis is from out west with the rest of my family. I transplanted myself to Quebec 20 years ago so I am perfectly bilingual now. My ex never spoke a word of english. Although both parents can speak french and had us speaking a somewhat baby french as toddlers. Being in english Canada and our parents divorsing, we stopped speaking french in the home after that. By the time I left home I pretty much forgot all the french I knew untill I had to relearn it in Quebec.
To get back to my sister, she isn't overly concerned about the language barrier. Everyone she works with is bilingual and she and Cléo are also pretty good at using hand signals and the few words they do know to be understood ..........hopefully.
We have a date. It has the all clear so my daughter Cléo gets to go for sure now. My sister chose a day that had some action in parliment . My daughter will be able to actually take her own picture of the PRIME MINISTER in parliment as he goes into the QUESTION PERIOD , she will be right next to the Press Core.. who are basically the media that normally covers all those things. That in itself will be pretty cool. It has already been arranged for my daughter to have her own official parlimentary pass with photo clipped to her like my sister has. Brigitte also chose oct because parliment reopens sessions so there will be ministers all over . She really hopes to show my daughter as much as she can and also give her lots of chances to take her own photos with a spare camera she has. I think my sister is as excited about it as Cléo is not to mention me lol. I am so thankful that my daughter has this opertunity all because her aunt has this cool job.
Cléo has to look like a professional on this day so we had to go shopping. We were very lucky to find a rather nice tailored suit at Walmart no less. Looks fab on her , black with fine satin black pinstripe in it. A black pair of leather loafers with a short heel that looks great with pants. She already had a nice crisp white blouse so all cost aproximately 100$ not bad considering. She also agreed to wearing the suit to school on the day of her career day presentation. When we got home and tryed the whole kit on I couldn't believe how grown up she looked. I think all moms get those OMG THATS MY LITTLE GIRL?(or BOY) flashes , those overwhelming feelings of pride combined with a fist to the abdomin kinda way? ....
The big day is in 2 weeks, OCT 18th. We have a 3 hr drive to my sister and her hubby's house on the sunday before . Cléo's first briefing of the next days scedule will be summarized that afternoon by the official translater (that would be me hehe) to be followed by a leizurely visit with Brigitte and Glen . Next morning early will be a rebriefing and hair consultation with hairdresser (that would be me again) then final inspection before heading out to her government appointed career day begins .......during which time I will biting all my nails off lol
I know it will be a great day for her and my sister. Regardless of the language barrier those 2 are so alike it's not funny. I will be giving you all an update when its all done and maybe have a few pics to share from that day aswell..........it will be called SAY CHEESE UPDATE..simple enough lol
Tuesday, September 28, 2004
ONE DAY AT A TIME
I haven't posted in awhile as you may have noticed. I guess the best way to explain why is just simply...nothing to say. I have been in a kinda blue funk. Part is obviously due to the loss of my aunt. Another part is the pure frustration due to my diabetes. I can not repeat enough how aware I am that things could be a lot worse. I also understand that many people are diagnosed with illnesses that can not be helped. I am thankful I have a way of getting better.
Having said that , it is still difficult to come to terms with the little things. I am still quite weak and that leads again to fatigue. I know it will take time for the iron pills to give me more strength , the anemia can't be rectified over night. It is also my yoyo sugar levels that affect me in a same yoyo pattern. Be it with the shakes or over heating, dizziness or just wanting to sleep, it becomes somewhat overwhelming along with the stomach aches, nausea, the runs , not wanting to eat when I should and being so hungry I could eat a horse when I shouldn't.
I freely admit to not being the most patient of persons . I am sure some will agree to that , far to quickly I might add . So , if it can't be fixed NOW , I become impatient, especially when it's about me. All this is the perfect example for that. I have to learn the old adage of one day at a time. Make small improvements . Deal with it slowly.
On a very positive note. I met with the dietician. I was expecting a radical diet change with a horde of other changes. I was pleasantly pleased that it wasn't the case. I really liked her way of thinking and her method of explaining the basic mechanics of diabetes . One thing she said though, struck me. I had always falsely assumed that someone with type 2 diabetes could *cure* or *heal* themselves of the decease if they got to that magic point where all drugs were eliminated and weight was healthy , diet control enabled the proper functioning of the pancreas.
Thus making that person diabetes *free* if you know what I mean. She was adamant about saying that once diabetic ALWAYS diabetic. I think I knew that deep down but didn't want to admit it. I had a warning 14 years before by having gestational diabetes , so I knew I was subject to getting it later on in life...and in so doing I held on to those false beliefs concerning this type of diabetes.
To continue in a positive vain though, I was surprised when the dietician told me to go back to what I was used to eating. I have to say that the day my doctor told me the bad news to the 6 days till seeing the dietician , I barely ate anything. I was almost afraid to eat. Ok so it's not entirely a bad thing given my weight but still. I didn't know how to start. You are told that sugar is bad and all carbs. So what's left???? Your first thought is NOTHING!!!...
As I mentioned, she told me to go back to the way I ate before. I have to admit to feeling relief and trepidation all at once. What she went on to say made so much sense and really helped me to release some pent up tension. She told me that for the next week, I was to write everything I ate, down. Also include all my blood levels . To notice the numbers. We would then go through it all together . She would show me portion sizes , sugar intake, separate the different elements all with my own menu choices. Also point out different ideas for substitutes and just slowly tweak it from there. No radical life changes over night, only building awareness and learning new tricks. As she explained, all diets work FOR A TIME then most people give up and go back to the same bad habits. I couldn't agree more as I already stated my opinion on DIETS in an earlier post. They just make people fat and fatter.
I felt oddly bouncy when I left her office with Chris. She was encouraging and I felt that her method of doing this was a very smart one. I certainly didn't get to this weight by having self control so a slow gradual change is a perfect way to get me through this. Making long term changes that will stick makes so much more sense to me. I have also started walking on the treadmill 10 minutes a day , increasing it when I can. Since hurting my back last year it takes little to feel the pain return. It terrifies me to push to hard. Having spent a month not being able to walk was horrible. I know to take it easy and not push ....one day at a time again.
All in all I am happy that I am learning new things and have started doing others. I am so fortunate to have a very supportive partner. He is my champion, my hero, my rocket man, my savior, my best friend, my Einstein, my lover and best of all he is this uniquely special human that loves me with all his heart as I love him.
Having said that , it is still difficult to come to terms with the little things. I am still quite weak and that leads again to fatigue. I know it will take time for the iron pills to give me more strength , the anemia can't be rectified over night. It is also my yoyo sugar levels that affect me in a same yoyo pattern. Be it with the shakes or over heating, dizziness or just wanting to sleep, it becomes somewhat overwhelming along with the stomach aches, nausea, the runs , not wanting to eat when I should and being so hungry I could eat a horse when I shouldn't.
I freely admit to not being the most patient of persons . I am sure some will agree to that , far to quickly I might add . So , if it can't be fixed NOW , I become impatient, especially when it's about me. All this is the perfect example for that. I have to learn the old adage of one day at a time. Make small improvements . Deal with it slowly.
On a very positive note. I met with the dietician. I was expecting a radical diet change with a horde of other changes. I was pleasantly pleased that it wasn't the case. I really liked her way of thinking and her method of explaining the basic mechanics of diabetes . One thing she said though, struck me. I had always falsely assumed that someone with type 2 diabetes could *cure* or *heal* themselves of the decease if they got to that magic point where all drugs were eliminated and weight was healthy , diet control enabled the proper functioning of the pancreas.
Thus making that person diabetes *free* if you know what I mean. She was adamant about saying that once diabetic ALWAYS diabetic. I think I knew that deep down but didn't want to admit it. I had a warning 14 years before by having gestational diabetes , so I knew I was subject to getting it later on in life...and in so doing I held on to those false beliefs concerning this type of diabetes.
To continue in a positive vain though, I was surprised when the dietician told me to go back to what I was used to eating. I have to say that the day my doctor told me the bad news to the 6 days till seeing the dietician , I barely ate anything. I was almost afraid to eat. Ok so it's not entirely a bad thing given my weight but still. I didn't know how to start. You are told that sugar is bad and all carbs. So what's left???? Your first thought is NOTHING!!!...
As I mentioned, she told me to go back to the way I ate before. I have to admit to feeling relief and trepidation all at once. What she went on to say made so much sense and really helped me to release some pent up tension. She told me that for the next week, I was to write everything I ate, down. Also include all my blood levels . To notice the numbers. We would then go through it all together . She would show me portion sizes , sugar intake, separate the different elements all with my own menu choices. Also point out different ideas for substitutes and just slowly tweak it from there. No radical life changes over night, only building awareness and learning new tricks. As she explained, all diets work FOR A TIME then most people give up and go back to the same bad habits. I couldn't agree more as I already stated my opinion on DIETS in an earlier post. They just make people fat and fatter.
I felt oddly bouncy when I left her office with Chris. She was encouraging and I felt that her method of doing this was a very smart one. I certainly didn't get to this weight by having self control so a slow gradual change is a perfect way to get me through this. Making long term changes that will stick makes so much more sense to me. I have also started walking on the treadmill 10 minutes a day , increasing it when I can. Since hurting my back last year it takes little to feel the pain return. It terrifies me to push to hard. Having spent a month not being able to walk was horrible. I know to take it easy and not push ....one day at a time again.
All in all I am happy that I am learning new things and have started doing others. I am so fortunate to have a very supportive partner. He is my champion, my hero, my rocket man, my savior, my best friend, my Einstein, my lover and best of all he is this uniquely special human that loves me with all his heart as I love him.
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