Tuesday, December 07, 2004

Xmas Letter

I am not referring to my xmas letter but the one my sister Nicole wrote this year. Her writting style is a small yet good glimse into her head. You will undoubtedly discover what I have known for years. My sis is smart, witty and very funny. Unlike our other globe trotting photographer sister(Brigitte), this one is a stay at home mom of 2 children but she has her own business doing AutoCad. Before that she made extra income by sewing/making all kinds of nifty crafts or towel sets for babies and selling them to boutiques. In other words Nicole has always been very creative and resoursefull. Many cool projects I have done in the past come from her insperations or her countless discoveries. She has always been the brainiac of the 3 of us. You know the kind. Those who breezed through school with straight A's without cracking open a book. What always comes to mind though as you get to know her is how she can make you laugh without even trying or how generous she is of herself with those she loves. She would so want to groan at everything I just wrote hehe but what can I say, I have always been extremely proud of her and felt lucky to have her as a sister the cool perk is also being a friend to this terrific woman.

Now to intro her letter. I will start by just mentioning that last years letter was a funny account of her dying appliances. Either by old age or straight out applianside...it was halarious to say the least. I can not begin to count the number of unsightly nonbeings. Suffice it to say it weren't purdy. Now this will explain a few references to that affect in the following letter. Hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

Nicole's Christmas Chronicle 2004

Did I hear someone say, “I wonder how Nicole’s appliances are
doing.”? I didn’t think so……….
Yes, gentle reader, it’s once again time for me to hold you all captive as I enthrall, titillate and otherwise mesmerize you with my tales of intrigue, international espionage, and steamy romance. No wait…..that’s not my life, that’s a James Bond movie. That kind of sucks for you because a Bond movie would be WAY more interesting. Anyway, here goes….
The past year has been a full one for us, not because of anything big, just all the never ending little stuff. The kids are now five and twelve. Tess is in seventh grade and hates all the homework she’s getting this year. She still plays percussion and keyboard in band and joined the school’s jazz band this year . She’s also still taking piano and has gotten to a level where she actually likes to practice. Woohoo! She still whines about doing the theory but hey, a mother can’t have everything. This past summer she wrote and passed her first level of theory at the Royal Conservatory. After she’s completed a couple more levels it’ll actually count as credits in high school. It’s not terribly motivating for her as it’s a payoff that is literally years away. She’s so short-sighted! The paper route is still a thorn in her side, but her bank account is really growing. At this rate she’ll be able to pay for some post-secondary education. However, at the rate university tuition is rising, she’ll only be able to afford to pay for about 15 minutes worth! That’s not even enough time to find all your classes…………..
Hayden started kindergarten this fall-good times! He got off to a rocky start but he soon figured out that school was fun and the first teary days became a distant memory. He claims that he ‘doesn’t want to grow up’ so we just avoid that topic and try never to use phrases like, “You’re getting to be such a big boy.” or “Eat your broccoli, it’ll make you grow big and strong.” It’s counterproductive.
As for my work, the air balancer I started working for just over a year ago has been busy and I’m doing all of his drafting as well as my Dad’s. So, I’m very busy these days between work, kindergarten shuttle service, classroom volunteering, and everything else that is my life. This time of year is always a little hectic and with me working a lot more, Christmas preparations are behind. I can contribute much more by way of funding at Christmas now, but I can’t find time to get to the stores and actually buy the stuff! It’s such a conundrum. Speaking of conundrums, Wade is fine and busy as always. The herd this year is still 24 hooves strong (he told me to say that-it sounds bigger) and for the first time the guys will be taking a couple of live cows to the butcher. Usually the ‘deed’ has already been done before they get delivered there. The butcher we used to use is no longer in the business so we’ve had to look elsewhere for the service. In a week’s time the two full grown cows need to be ear-tagged and coaxed into the horse trailer (for the first time in their lives) without the use of the usual equipment like a cattle squeeze and/or a shoot. It should prove to be an interesting and very long day for the cowboys and whatever gets locked in that trailer-man or beast- goes to the butcher, so they’d better be careful. I’d try to document every agonizing detail on video if I didn’t think I’d be shaking so hard from laughter that I’d spoil the footage. I’ll let you know how it turns out. In the meantime, I’ll keep looking over my shoulder because Wade is determined to practice on something or someone with his new ear-tagging gun. My ears are ALREADY pierced, thank you very much, and NO I do not want a nose ring!
Brigitte and Glen are doing fine. Brigitte is really enjoying her job with the Prime Minister’s Office. She’s traveled to Russia, France, Chile and Africa, just to name a few places. We’ve been the recipients of some lovely souvenirs and appreciate her thinking of us. In February she and Glen came to Calgary for a big tattoo convention (Glen’s a very talented artist) so we were able to have a nice visit with them. Brigitte and I went to Canmore for an overnight stay to enjoy some girl time and the boys had to watch the fort and keep the home fires burning. Brigitte and I got stinking drunk and partied like animals. Wait…that’s another movie. In reality, except for the Puerto Rican stripper named Julio and the unfortunate incident with a police cruiser that lead to the need for bail money, we behaved like proper married women. We shopped and shopped, then got facials and manicures. It was heavenly.
Mom and Ben are also well. Ben had some health issues this past summer and had surgery to remove his gall bladder, which was causing him all kinds of trouble. After some surgery related complications, he fortunately has bounced back and is his usual active self.
Monette, Chris and Cleo are faring well also. They’ve gone through some job/work changes, causing some upheaval but ultimately working out for the best for both of them on many levels. I’m sure they’re relieved to be through it now and are settling into the new routine. We hope they can make it out west for a visit next summer.
Now you, fair reader, have been unaware as you read that while I’ve been writing this letter, I have fought with valiant effort, an internal battle. The inner war I waged was to keep myself from mentioning anything about household appliances, other than my opening sentence which was meant to make you laugh and to frighten you all at the same time. Having fought the good fight I am faced with the harsh reality that my inner ‘troops’ are weary and I’m out of ‘ammo’. I am waving the white flag and surrender to my driving need to inform you that we finally got a new fridge. For this I must largely thank the air balancer I work for in Calgary. No, he didn’t buy me a fridge, but his Christmas gift last year put us in the right place at the right time. He gave us tickets to a magic show and we (by some unexplained miracle that I hope to repeat sometime in the next decade) got there quite early. We went into the nearby SEARS store to kill time and the fridge we’d been lusting after for some time was on sale and there was a ‘no GST’ event ending that day. We took this as an omen, threw caution to the wind (Old, still-chugging, ugly almond top mount refrigerator be damned!) and bought a new one. Fear not all you environmentally conscious loved ones, ‘Old Faithful’ is happily chugging on in one of our rental properties living out the rest of its dubious life with useful purpose. We’ve since added a cupboard above the new fridge where there wasn’t one before because Wade has learned that the way to my heart is through added kitchen cabinetry (refer to Cowie Chronicle-2002). I am currently on a covert mission, planting the seeds of ‘stove replacement’ in my dear husband’s subconscious. I’ll let you know how the cassette tapes I play while he sleeps, and the subliminal messages in oil on the bathroom mirror (visible only when it’s steamed up) are working. I’d settle for a new love seat in the front room, but that’s not an appliance, it’s furniture. You don’t want to get me started on furniture…………..

All kidding aside, this is a Christmas letter after all and we send our good wishes to all our friends and family during this holiday season. May you be blessed with health, happiness, people who love you, and most importantly, decent appliances.
Merry Christmas!


Rae said...

she sounds as delightful as I know you too be Moon ;)

and you're right she is funny ;)

Squirrels said...

I agree she is funny and so are you. Moon you know what I noticed, your blog doesn't have a place to click on to send you an email. Or doesn't state your email address so people can harass you! :)

Anonymous said...

Absolute literary genius! It's the 'feel good' Christmas letter of the season. If you only get to read one Christmas letter this year, this is the one to read. I give it five out of five candy canes.
The only thing I could have done without was the introduction; it was so SWEET I think it gave me diabetes. Nobody's THAT wonderful!!