Saturday, December 31, 2005

Another Year Comes to a Close

As I reflect apon this past year I have alot to be thankful for.

1. Last January after 3 long years of trying, Chris finally got his divorce! All that was left to do was send a pile of documents to France to have them processed in order for them to Recognize said divorce.

2. Chris' ability to surprise me continues to amaze me. Wether by being just the man that he is or how special he makes me feel. It seems that it keeps getting better as the years we spend together acumulate. (hands out free barf bags for all those just ready to hurl as we speak...HAHA)

3. Being able to sit down with Chris at a jewelers and design our rings for the future. We are neither difficult or extravagant, our choices were very simple in design but they turned out to be the most beautiful rings in the whole wide world. HEHE

4. Getting a Brand New Vehicle , a first for both of us. Although Chris had an accident within 3 days of having it, no one was hurt and everything turned out fine in the end. We are still very pleased with our choice of the SantaFé.

5. Flying out west to visit family this summer and also showing Chris some of the Canada I come from.

6. Crying as Chris looks up at me from bended knee asking me to marry him. This all among family I hold dear.

7. Being in a closed Bakery with so many choices and so little time!

8. After 4 years of promising, finally redecorating Cléo's room.

9. My dad and his wife coming for a visit and buying Cléo a piano and paying for lessons as well.

10. My little girl turning 15! Where did the time go?

11. Getting a new laptop cause the old one died. My sanity was on the line cause I hate daytime TV!

12. Finally getting the official Recognition from France that Chris is Divorsed! Yes! 11 months later!

13. Having Chris' son and daughter here for Christmas has been a real treat for all of us. We will bring in the New Year with his children and my daughter who have been getting along famously. Chris also announced to them during a private moment that we are engaged and will be getting married. Their first thought was, CAN WE BE AT THE WEDDING?!... so that was positive lol.

14. I can also thing of a thousand moments during the year that I enjoyed my friends company. Wether it be in person by phone, chat or even through reading their blog. I never had a huge number of true friends but the ones I do are very important to me.

I could cite many more things from this year but as we know I am long winded to start with, it would turn into a book.
Let me just wish for everyone reading this , A Very Happy New Year!!!!

From my family to yours BONNE ANNEÉ!!!

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

The Smallest of Things can make the Biggest Difference

Every year I try to find cute little do dads to put in my daughter and niece's Christmas stocking. This year I also put together stockings for Chris' children as well. They had never had one. There is never anything very expensive in these stockings...usually stuff like chocolate and candy with some girly things like nail polish and makeup or bubble bath and cute socks.. had to think of boy things for Chris' son aswell....One of the special things I did find for all the kids this year was an adorable little brown bear.

A stuffed bear? you say....other then being cute, nothing special with that eh...
Well you are wrong hehe.

These little bears have a little recorder in them so u can record a short message on them. Granted the quality was somewhat poor but I thought the idea was great. I thought it would be awesome for Chris to record a little message on his son's and his daughter's bear so that when they are back home in France they could just push the left paw and listen to their dad say...I love you and I am thinking of you...or something similar in french ofcourse.

I did the same for my daughter's bear but I had something different in mind for my niece Chantal.

Chantal is 16 yrs old. Her mother who was also my best friend, died of cancer 6 years ago. She was also my sister in law at the time. Chantal's dad is my ex's brother. Cléo my daughter and Chantal have always been very close cousins and ever since Manon died I have always had my door open for Chantal. She also always comes here for Christmas. Her dad usually goes to my ex's house but Chantal prefers to be with us here. I try to make it as tradition as possible for them both.

Anyway to get to my point...Just before Manon died..I brought my little cam corder to the hospital to film her and get her to say a few things to her daughter on tape. The reason for this was because Chantal being only around 10 yrs old at the time was not fully aware of the gravity of the situation with her mom. She was told everything but she was staying with friends here and there and being a kid, and they were not really suggesting she should spend time in the hospital with her mom...they took everything of what the psychologist in the hospital said to heart as in... Do not push her to come see you as to not Tramatize her for life or Let her just talk on the phone with her and let her play with her friends bla bla bla....Now I am the first to agree that forsing the issues would have been a bad idea but I don't think it was a better idea to just let Chantal stay at friends houses with not a care in the world either then have her mother die and then it be to late for her to say her goodbyes. To wake up years later feeling quilty that she didn't spend more time with her when she could.....Everyone in the family hummed and hawed all in agreement with Manon and Sylvain's attitude...I was the only one who seemed to care how Chantal would feel YEARS LATER... I tryed to convince them otherwise but to no avail...So I went without sleep for 2 days trying to think of something I could do. I came up with a comprimize..I asked Manon if I could tape her talking to Chantal and telling her how much she loved her etc....I have to add that Manon even in the last week...looked as she always did..other then looking tired, she looked like herself , she wasn't sickly or sunken looking like some become. I wanted to have this tape for years later when Chantal started to miss her mom or wanted maybe different answers that she was to young to ask earlier. Also something to take away her quilt for not being there .... by knowing her mom understood....this is where my point comes in...

It is from this tape I took a short message for Chantal's bear....she says ( I will always be watching over you from my white cloud in the sky).....

I wish it could have been clearer then it is on this bear..given its from a 6 yr old video cassette and the bear recorder is bad quality, its not very discernable unless u already know what it says but once u do u can make it out. It took me 20 trys to get it in the 6 second frame lol but I made it lol.

When she heard it and I told her about it, she started to cry. So did my daughter sitting next to her. It wasn't a sad cry, it was a touched cry. She never let go of that bear all evening and even went to bed before the others to cuddle her little bear close. She did however ask me where her mom had said that. We have often looked over old cassettes taken over the yrs as the girls were growing...but she realized this wasn't said on one of I told her abit of the cassette I made and if she wanted to see it, we could do that some day soon. I felt that this year she needed to have her mother close. Her father is always absent, throwing himself into work, she can't be here as often as she would like or need given she lives in another township.

Anyway...I just wanted to share this with some of you. It was a very small thing I did but it made a big difference to her.

If you havent already read it, I posted a short story about the day we found out Manon had cancer. Please read it , I hope it saves a life out there. It isn't long and even has some funny bits but the message is very important...take a minute to read it for yourself or a loved one.......When Was Your Last PaP Test?

Monday, December 26, 2005

A Few Pics to Share

Chris beaming with his son and daughter.

My daughter and his

Can you tell with the mess that all the gifts have been opened and now they are trying to figure out how it all works lol

Everyone got spoiled and all had a great Christmas.

Saturday, December 24, 2005


Welcome to my home and our traditions. Today the 24th of Dec , Eve of Christmas is when we open all our gifts. Yes it's the strike of midnight on Christmas Eve we rip open ALL our presents.

Let me me go back in time to when I was a little girl and tell you how our magical Christmas' happened.

Magical for me because although my childhood was a very difficult one, our Christmas' always seemed to be exempt from most of the negative aspects that surrounded our lives. Or my sisters and I just made it so in our heads, who knows lol.

First of all, somehow we knew that santa was poor therefore he could only bring one thing to each child. When that sears catalog arrived a month or so before xmas we painstakingly leafed through everypage trying to decide which toy it would be. That catalog became so dog eared and wrinkled by the time all 3 of us went through it a million times its a good thing mom thought to have another one stashed away for her own use and to be able to decipher the item numbers with. When THE toy was finally chosen, we waited for it anxiously at Christmas. The days approuching Xmas when the decorations came out and mom did the tree it was all so special. Our tree was the most beautiful of everyones ofcourse. Presents from relatives and eachother would start to appear underneath it. OH I WONDER WHAT'S IN THAT ONE?...... We also had a manger under it with all the figures in it except the baby jesus in his little bed. He was not yet born so his bed was empty.

On Christmas Eve we either had a big meal or buffet with just us or visiting family and friends. Always lots of food for ppl to munch on through the evening. Us children though, had to go to bed so Santa could come. I even remember one year, just before bedtime, dad brought us to a window that had some snow and frost sticking to it ...looking through one of the panes of glass he points to the sky and says '' Do u see it?'' '' Way Way up in the sky so far it's just a tiny speck but it's Santa's sleigh...See There?.....We were so and wide eyed we all 3 of us strained to see the tiny speck in the sky that was Santa's sleigh and declared....'' I SEE IT! I SEE IT! IT'S MOVING IN THE SKY PAPA , YIPPEE!!!.....all 3 of us goobers danced around with glee. I swear to this day I saw it lol.

So off to bed we would go to sleep. Always so excited thinking we would never be able to but always did. Then at midnight the baby jesus had been born AND Santa had come and gone. We are then woken up . All sleepy but wide eyed we scurry to the tree to first see our covetted toy we chose with care. That one was never wrapped , it was always just sitting there on display ready for our loving hands. Once over the initial excitement of getting THE toy, we had to notice that the baby jesus was in his bed in the manger.

We then opened all the rest of our gifts. Ate more food and finally went back to bed in the wee hours of the night. All happy with what we got and thankful for everything.

Everyone sleeps in Christmas morning since we all went to be so late, and for the most part Christmas day is a lazy day for all except mom doing the turkey for supper.

I repeated the same traditions with my daughter but over the years I have added a couple more. I added stockings. We never had those growing up. I make one for my daughter and niece filled with do dads and what nots all silly little things. I also started buying new pj's for everyone for xmas eve evening. So everyone has fresh new pj's and we are all comfy for a late night opening gifts. As the children get older they no longer have to go to bed. We just all enjoy a late evening buffet and enjoy being together.

My daugher and my niece Chantal are here along with the rare treat of having Chris' kids with us this year as well.

I have shared a few of our traditions with you. What's fun to hear are the different ones that others have with their families. Tell me what some of yours are. I am sure others would be interested to know also. In the meantime, I wish you all a JOYEUX NOËL ....many hugs...0x0x0x

Saturday, December 17, 2005


For those who wanted to know...Chris' children arrived safe and sound. Not without stress on our parts mind you. For the obvious reasons wondering initially if his ex would get them to the airport on time then yesterday..arrival day, we got hit with a wopper of a snow storm. Starting early started snowing nonstop..schools were closed and all domestic flights going in and out were cancelled. We had the Air France website on keeping track of their flights. They had a short flight to Paris to start then a direct flight from Paris to Montreal. We saw by the website that it had left we were then concerned it wouldn't land in Montreal with this storm.

Highways were blocked or just full of accidents and my ex even called after driving into Montreal for work to suggest Chris leave for the airport right then to be on time...This was said at 9am..flight was due at 3pm...its normally a one hour drive.....We weighed the options and decided to wait till the plows had begun making headways. ...He left at noon...and it went well, and just under 2 hours but only because he stayed behind a snow plow.

They landed fine...Chris was at the gate waiting. Almost 2 hours later, they still hadn't come through the gate. Apparently others waiting were starting to snarl. Chris was becoming impatient to say the least...he hadn't seen his kids in 9 months and before that it had been almost 3 long yrs. (This was not by choice believe me)

The phone rang and when I answered Chris announced.. THE EAGLES HAVE LANDED!!!...WHOOOO HOOOO....

When Chris signed for the kids. (son 11yrs & daughter 13 yrs old) .they had an airline attendant..she informed Chris that it is a NO, NO! to have minors transport cigarettes and alcoholic beaverages!...Chris was like WTF?...then figures that his daughter must have a bottle of wine as a gift from France for her looks at both kids with attendant there and says...OK, WHICH ONE OF YOU SMOKES NOW!?!?... that even had the attendant laughing. LOL....

They got home an hour later, as the roads had been plowed. It was great to see them. More hugs and kisses. Sat down to supper and watched as my Chris had twinkles in his eyes and a beaming smile as he and his kids goofed around together. I was so happy for them all.

Chris has to work this weekend but after tuesday he is off till Jan 3rd. Poor kids are stuck here with me and Luc lol...they atleast have the pc to play on. I actually got alot done. Made 4 batches of fudge, and aprox 130 xmas cookies.

We have 3 precious weeks with them. I hope they have a great time here with us. I send hugs to all my friends..and hope u all get your xmas stuff done in time. HUGS TO EVERYONE

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

My 2005 Christmas Letter

It's that time of year again. Is it me or does it seem that as soon as we are done putting away the tree and Christmas decorations, we have to take them out again? Ok, I realize that there is a summer squeezed in between but it zooms by like that lone fly you can never catch.

This past summer, Chris, Cléo and I went out west to see the family. It was a first for Chris as he hadn't yet met some of my family or seen anything of western Canada. I believe Chris made a good impression with my family. The very first day we arrived, when we were gathered at mom and Ben's for supper with Nicole and her family, Chris surprised everyone including me by getting on bended knee and proposing to me. YES YOU HEARD IT RIGHT! My parent's OLDEST daughter is FINALLY getting married! I said YES by the way. (PSST... Dad, you can put the shotgun away).
This coming January Chris starts a new position as a supervisor at the pharmaceutical company where he works. Once he starts we will be better able to chose a wedding date. If all works out I would love June 9th. It is the date my grandparents married. They adored eachother till death. It is also the date my (divorced) parents married. They will have OTHER unadoring feelings till death. So I figure it skips a generation.

We had a great week spend in Cochrane with mom, Ben, Nicole, Wade, Tess and Hayden. Many a photo was taken during our different activities. I think my favorite is the one of my loving sister Nicole giving me the finger...oops I mean adjusting her glasses. Oh but I also love the few shaky ones I took of the mountains in Banff as we took the Gondola to the mountain top. Shaky why? Well as I had to unweld one of my cold damp hands from the side bar, in the flimsy, almost totally windowed, death trap of a cable car, to hold the camera, all while keeping an eye on the thread like thickness of a cable, sure to snap by the slightest shift of this big girl's weight, there by hurdling us to a horrid, seen by every angle in slow motion, DEATH a trillion feet below...may have caused my camera hand a few gentle movements during this serene moment of totally breathtaking beauty and calm wonderment.
The following week was spent in Regina with dad and Christine and relatives all over. It was so nice to see everyone. We were also able to do a few new things. Due to my brother André's wife Ellen, Cléo was able to do some horseback riding and we also had the oportunity of spending time at the Regina Science Center where Ellen works. Chris and Cléo both had a few runs going up the climbing wall as I cheered them on. I secretly knew I could do so much better but as I had a skirt on I opted for letting them compete with eachother. Besides those harnesses looked like they were made out of wet toilet paper.....well close to it anyway.
As holidays are, the two weeks sped by. We flew home to return to the routine but luckily dad was coming out east. We were able to spend more time with him and Christine and they bought Cléo a piano. She had expressed wanting to learn and as he had done the same for Nicole's daughter Tess a few years earlier, we found a nice one and got it home shortly after that. Cléo started lessons once a week since sept and already knows some Beethoven among other things. I have yet to ask her to pratice. It's more like telling her to do her homework INSTEAD of play piano. What a delinquent!! I knew that 15 would be rough, it's the age pending disaster I tell you!!!

Finally, this Christmas will be very special for Chris because we will have his children here to celebrate it with us. They arrive from Paris France this Dec 16th. His daughter Mahault is 13 and his son Thomas is 11. Needless to say, Chris doesn't see them often and this will be the first Christmas in 4 years they have spent together. We will have three weeks to spend with them and enjoy every minute. With that I wish for all of you to spend this holiday season with friends and loved ones and appreciate every moment. Accept our best wishes for a JOYEUX NOËL ET BONNE ANNEÉ........0X0X0X Monette, Chris et Cléo
PS...Those among you who know will be recieving a card from me in the mail. PLEASE DO NOT READ ABOVE LETTER..

Friday, December 02, 2005

It's that time of year again.

YUP, it's that time of year again. I have started to have the xmas spirit this year. I am glad because last year I wasn't really into it. Chris' divorse was still pending, we still had too much furniture in the house to make room for my xmas decorations and I hadn't made any of my xmas baking stuffs because of my recent diagnosis diabetese.

This year , Chris is divorsed. We also rented a storage space to put most of his extra furniture with a few of mine. We have cleared a space for the xmas tree this year. In past yrs I had put it all up, downstairs next to the fireplace but given that we have to be with Luc all day upstairs, we really wouldn't enjoy it. So a place has been cleared upstairs so we can enjoy it all day. I also intend to do some baking. I have lost 40lbs so far and part of the reason is not depriving myself of my favorite things by using moderation. Last but not least, Chris' two children are coming for xmas. They live in Paris France and Chris hasn't spent xmas with them for the last 4 years. I am thrilled for him, it will do them all good to spend this time together. We unfortunately anticipate his ex wife of somehow sabataging their trip. She seems to enjoy trying to hurt Chris every chance she gets. So we will only allow ourselves to believe that they will actually be here when they step off the plane in Montreal. If that happens they will be here for 3 weeks. If they don't, we will have lost almost $2000 in airfare and theres not a whole lot we can do about it. So send good vibes our way, it can only help lol.

Today is my day out of the house. I look forward to seeing all the xmas decorations in the stores. Getting some shopping done and going to a resturant for supper. We will do our own tree decorating next week given Chris has to work all weekend. I need him to help me bring up all the boxes from downstairs. He already did the outside though, looks really nice. Our first snow has already melted but as soon as we have some more I will take a photo of the outside lights on the house. Snow makes it look so much better lol. We have 5 columns infront of my house so Chris wound big red ribbon around them so they look like candy canes.

I hope I get a few good gift ideas today. I am almost done with my family out west. We do a hat pick among us between the 4 cpls. We don't include the children though we all get alittle something for the 3 kids between us. Since we are all across the country, we try to pick something out of the Sears catalog so we can have it shipped directly to them. That way we save the shipping. Since it's something they gave us the idea about anyway, it's not big deal that they have to wrap it for under the tree. When that doesn't happen, well we pack a parcel lol. Luckily this yr, most is from the catalog.

Next week at the very latest, Chris and I have to get a photo taken . My sister was supposed to take an engagement pic of us but it was not from lack of trying that it didn't happen. It was either her schedule or ours that it just didn't come to be. I really wanted to have one done to put in my xmas cards this year. I just a trim with a colour touchup done yesterday so next week Chris and I HAVE to get it done. I don't care if its with a timer and a tripod or even the cam on the computer as long as its a pic I can live with lol. I have to mail out my cards soon and being a stickler for perfection it takes me time to do them all. I have this weekend to do my xmas letter that I include in all of them but the time consuming part is the envelopes. I do all the addresses in caligraphy. No not with a printer!!! I do them by hand! lol. I think it looks beautiful on a nice xmas envelope, kinda old world looking. I think it adds a personal touch and hey, I think I would enjoy recieving one of my cards in the mail looking like that lol. But that's just me.
Anyway..till next long winded post...enjoy this season. Even all the hussle and bussle. Be thankful to be alive and most importantly...I am easily pleased so what ever u get me for xmas will be absolutely GREAT! hehe....oxox

Thursday, November 24, 2005


We have had our new guy for one week now. OMG! what a pleasure he is. It is like night and day from our previous client who just moved. I realize that in my choice of work, there is a reason all these adults need to live in foster care and over the years I have to had to deal with many different kinds of needs. Luc is an obvious high needs case all around but our previous border Martin, being very functional was a hand full nonetheless. He never appreciated anything we did for him and always wanted more using munipulation by any means. So having dealt with that for 10 yrs makes it that much more enjoyable to have a client that is the sheer opposite to that.
Ray seems really happy to be here. During his initial visit here he loved his room from the start, even was surprised when I told him it would be getting a fresh coat of paint before he moved in. Then when he finally did he was very pleased to help put his stuff away. I used that incentive to get him to purch alot of acumulated useless stuff even including a couple unmatched bedside tables he brought with him from his former residense. Frankly it bewilders me that they sent such delapitated pieces of crap. I think over time these clients with the help of the family they are living with could finance a few nice things of their own. I mean geez..

Ray has what had been discribed as his own comfortable tv's the ugliest feking chair I ever saw! I am telling you right now, it isn't going to live here a day past xmas. We did not paint and fix up a nice room to have it sharply contrastED with a 35 yr old wooden chair with brown/yellow coushins with a acordian fringe in same fabric stapled directly to the wood of the first thought was HOW AM I GOING TO REAPOSTER THIS MONSTROSITY!...I then decided a minute later that IT WASN'T GOING TO HAPPEN. There are many really nice reclining chairs in fake or real leather that aren't huge but really comfortable and even have a matching foot stool for 100$ or less then 200$. He is already looking forward to going shopping with us next month to chose one he likes. He has enough in his account for one in that price range and even if he didn't I would have bought it to finance it over time for him. We also got him different organizing tools for his belts and shoes and a sturdy coat rack for his packsac and winter coat etc...

He was so happy at the trouble we took to make his room special just for him. He is always smiling and even sings a few words here and there for no apparent reason lol. He likes to be helpful like shovelling the snow or putting a new role of toilet paper on the holder. He is so proud to help. Chris and I are constantly smiling at his perpetual thankyous and sweet nature. We will both enjoy and appreciate the differences in him that we hadn't previously witnessed in clients before. We also realize that the *honeymoon stage* will be over soon but for the most part I had known Ray to be of pretty good nature anyway. He has difficulty with his diction so we are getting used to understanding what he is trying to say at times but he repeats when we need him too.

All in all we have had a great week getting to know Ray our new client/border. It just reasures me 100 fold about the good decision I took in having Martin move after caring for him 10 yrs. Granted I will get less money for Ray. Thats the way it works. He is less difficult to care for but it's not only about the is also about peace of mind and quality of life. Luc is much more work but it's more of a physical nature caring for him. I think I have found a good balance now with both clients. If we are able to buy a bigger home eventually I wouldn't mind having one or two more but that will only be if I have alot of room to do a good job and have a continued quality of life. I could not do this job without the enormous help and support I get from Chris. Takes a big man to accept this kind of homelife and to then become an integral part of my whole support system. I am such a lucky woman.

Today as I write this on the day that my american friends call THANKS GIVING....even as a Canadian....I have so much to be THANKFULL FOR......


Saturday, November 19, 2005


Ok people get your minds out of the gutter. Although sweet, tender, moist and delicious, I am NOT referring to sex...although that could infact discribe my wonderfull sex life hehe.....I digress..

This summer while on holiday, my dad drove us a couple hours out of Regina to a small town where my dad grew up and where I was also born. There are still family there. One uncle has a farm close by and there is an aunt who lives in town alone and yet another uncle who's wife has run one of the local salons for years. She still does and ALSO runs the town bakery! She took it over a couple yrs ago and doing a great job. My aunt Terri has spunk if ever I saw it and is one of the sweetest ladies there is.

So we arrive in town and stop off at my aunt and uncles place. He later took us over to give us a tour of the bakery. OMG...just imagine the decadent aroma of fresh breads and pasteries. He shows us all the ovens and churning tools and how some of the stuff is made. It was really quite fascinating seeing how it all works in the back of a bakery and also how spic and span it was kept even after a full days work. The shop was about to close so once in the front...seeing all the yummy stuff behind the glass counter I was ready to buy some stuff before we left with uncle to go eat at a nearby resturant. Uncle would have nothing of it. He said we would come back after we had supper for some desert.

Let me just interject something at this point lol. Before leaving on vacation, Chris and I already had a talk about the whole diabetese thing. He is always my helper but he totally gets that holiday means holiday aswell so it was understood that I would be less vigilant with the control of my sugar/carb intake, just as long as I took my meds religiously.

So we have a great meal at the local chinese resturant where dad told us stories of that same place being there when he was a kid but it was like a resturant/soda fountain place then. How he punched one of the guys in the kitchen for being a jerk to his older but slower brother. (who died just a few yrs later) Dad was drop dead gorgous and the second youngest of 18.....YES...18 KIDS...and has never had a mean bone in his body.

Well supper is done so we head back to the now closed bakery. Even the store front windows are curtained over so you can't see inside. Uncle unlocks the door and we walk in. He then says...choose what ever u want for desert and anything to bring home with you...please take as much as u want..we have to refill the shelves with fresh stuff ...and IT'S ON THE HOUSE...

OMG! OMG! OMG! that moment I realized I was living one of my fantasies of being locked in a bakery hehe. I took in all the scrumptious pasteries, studdles, butter tarts, brownies, nanimo bars and so on and so on and so my body wanted to go into sugar shock just looking at it my mouth watered like a starving man at a buffet. Visions of sugar plum fairies dancing in my brain as my pupils dialated enough to get a focus of Chris' face for reasurance to see him just grinning at me from ear to ear cause he totally understood and saying with his eyes...GO FOR IT...and the other thought..unspoken was,,,,you brought your pills right?

Let me reasure you all that although I could have seriously gotten naked and roled in all that stuff with glee. I infact conducted myself with class and decorum. I ate two different things there as my uncle is piling stuff in a huge paper bag for us to take home. Some of this, that, and more those there with a side of try these. Earlier when I was trying to purchase was some nanimo bars...well he gave me the whole tray to take home...OMG IT WAS CHRISTMAS I TELL YA!!!!!

I thought I had died and gone to heaven...even checked for a pulse... it was beating alright....and my pancreas was in overdrive preparing for what it just witnessed.

So in closing, we had baked goods for days after. It was all delightfull but honestly just being there at that moment was a FANTASY LIVED!

PS...During my whole vacation, didn't lose an onze of weight...but...I DIDN'T GAIN ANY EITHER HEHE
PSS...In all though to date I have lost 40lbs

Monday, November 14, 2005


This past week has been full of changes. Let me start with the good stuff. Oh's ALL good stuff.

Two months ago I finally made the decision to ask for a displacement for Martin. He is the border/client I have had for 10 years. He is high functioning unlike our blind Luc that I have previously written about but he has other traits that are difficult to deal with. As much as Luc can be physically tirering , Martin is mentally draining. He has major attitude problems, lies, manipulates anyone who can or will be munipulated etc etc....I began to realize as hard as Luc was to care for, atleast he was easier on my mental state by not talking back or trying to cause problems all the time. Also after 10 years I think Martin can gain as much as I can in making a change. Hense , asking for a displacement.....I gave them till the end of Nov. to find another place. I had the intention of using the empty room during the xmas season for Chris' children who are coming here from Paris for 3 weeks. This past week we got confirmation of a new place and he liked it when he did a visit. I was called to arrange the moving day. Martin moved last friday..I have to say as much of a relief as it was, it also pinched my heart after having him 10 yrs.

In that same convo about moving Martin, they offered me a new client to fill the soon to be empty, room.

I was surprised they had someone and explained that I had planned to reopen the room for a client in January only. They told me who the client was and that it couldn,t wait till january if I was interested. Well, I knew the client from a friend of mine having cared for him in the past. He is a great client. High functioning, very helpful, good appearance, clean and organised and happy. He can be abit difficult to understand because of a speech impediment but it will just takes time to get used to his speaking.

He came to visit our house today with his caseworker. We got on great so he is ready to move in on Thursday. YAY! We are putting a fresh coat of paint in the room tomorrow to make it all ready for our new guy.

The last but most important of our changes this week came in the form of an envelope. As many know, it took Chris 3 years to get a divorse but even with that done here, it still needed to be recognised in his country of France. It took mailing a bunch of requests to different offices in france for different documents to complile what was needed to finally sent it all to another office. THEN WAIT. and WAIT and WAIT till we got a document saying they RECOGNISED HIS France. THAT is the envelope we recieved!!!!! Now we can finally set a date to get married. If all goes well, and Chris can get time off , we would like to marry on June 9th or 2006. It's not official yet but I would love that date. It was the date my grand-parents married and they adored eachother till death, it was also date my parents got married and they will hate eachother till death (have been divorsed over 20 yrs now) lol....I figure the good Karma, SKIPS a generation LOL....I am not superstitious but I do think it would be cool to have 3 generations with the same anniversary on the family tree.

Thats all for now...hugs to my friends.

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

To Funny

I got this from a friend. I just had to share this with all of you, some of these are just to funny!!

Alternate meanings for

common words. The winners are

1. Coffee (n.) the person upon whom one coughs.

2. Flabbergasted (adj.) appalled over how much weight you havegained.

3. Abdicate (v.) to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

4. Esplanade (v.) to attempt an explanation while drunk.

5. Willy-nilly (adj.) impotent.

6. Negligent (adj.) describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.

7. Lymph (v.) to walk with a lisp.

8. Gargoyle (n.) olive-flavored mouthwash.

9. Flatulence (n.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.

10. Balderdash (n.) a rapidly receding hairline.

11. Testicle (n.) a humorous question on an exam.

12. Rectitude (n.) the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.

13. Pokemon (n) a Rastafarian proctologist.

14. Oyster (n.) a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.

15. Frisbeetarianism (n.) (back by popular demand): The belief that, when you die, your soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.

16. Circumvent (n.) an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.

Saturday, October 29, 2005


As of this month we have had our blind Luc a whole year already. It has been a year full of new experiences that have passed quiCkly like a bout of diarrhea or slow like excruciating constipation. You will understand my shitty analogies in a moment.

As Luc is severely mentally handicapped he is unable to comunicate much. He does understand a few key words but that's about it. Over the past year I have become attached to Luc over the thick and thick of things. Luc shows little emotion but he has been known to enjoy laying his head on my breast for a few moments when he lets me hug him. Other then that nothing unless he is not happy, then we all know it.

We can identify different things by the sounds he makes. For instance he seems happy enough when he sits at his kitchen chair rocking his head back and forth and moans. He also kinda of fills his cheeks full of air, swallows it and treats us with the joyous sounds of burps that seem like they come from the DEPTHS OF HELL!! Let me also mention that his digestive system is a work of art. I have to feed him all pureed food but it continues to entertain him and us for 30 minutes after his meal is done. It muraculously finds its way back up his throat to his mouth so he can enjoy it again. We can hear this reguratation quite clearly . It fills me with warm fuzzy thoughts as I know how much he loves to eat and knowing he can enjoy it all twice is so pleasing to me and him I am sure.

Luc's other hobby is sitting sideways on the toilet seat with his feet up on it (yes u read that right) He is a tiny little man so he feels comfortable on there while rocking back and forth. It also helps him to be in that position when a bowel movement decides to grace us with its presence. Luc has majoy constiption issues. It is not out of the ordinary for him to shit once a week or less but when it happens we know by the sound he makes. We could be sitting in the living room and hear Luc in the bathroom make kind of a muffled growl and know it's THAT TIME.. it always makes us clap with glee when that happens. Then we draw straws to win who gets to go in and flush halfway through so he doesn't plug up the toilet. There is so much that it takes no time to fill the house with the aroma that is Luc, in the air.

On one such occasion a week or so ago, Luc did this as per usual and when I thought he was done I made sure that his posterior was clean but he then wanted to remain on the toilet be it. I returned to the kitchen. He exited a few minutes later coming towards me with arms stretched in the kitchen. I was touched because felt like he was actually seeking my to give me a hug. It was so obvious he wasn't going towards his kitchen chair like he usually does. My heart was swelling at the thought when I notice him stop short in the middle of his walking towards me. He reaches behind him inside his pants, and proceeds to pull out a big ball of CRAP! that was stuck to his ASS!! holds it out towards me then just throws it on the floor. I have heard of a burnt offering but thats rediculous!!! He then goes to sit down at his usual place at the table....OH NO U DON'T!!!....Once my brain kicked into action after witnessing this I got him back to the bathroom ASAP of course and got him and everything else cleaned up. OY VEY!!

It gets better. Oddly enough, this week Luc has actually shit everyday. This would be a great thing under normal circumstances except Luc has been showing different odd behaviors lately, all duelly noted for the doctors. He had some changes done to him meds in the recent past and we have been noting these changes to try to curb some of them. The most pressing infact is his bowel movements. It would seem that he is overly fascinated by them. He now wants to play with it as it comes out and also wipe some under his nose so he can smell it real close like. The shit doesn't hit the FAN here, it hits his HAND and flies all over the place!!!...NOW we draw straws to see who has to stay in there the whole time he is in there shitting in order to prevent him playing with it. I sure hope this new hobby is short lived!!! Otherwise, anyone have a gas mask for sale cheep?

Next time you think your having a shitty and be happy it isn't literal. LMAO

Friday, October 28, 2005


Here are some pics of my engagement ring (she says with pride)
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I had to add this one below of both of the set...hopefully if all goes well, by June next yr I will be wearing both on my finger. We are unable to officially set a date yet as we are still waiting for a last document from France saying they recognize Chris' devorse. We have waited this long....glad to know we are in the home stretch.
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Aren't they gorgeous? If I do say so myself.....

Saturday, October 22, 2005


YAY!! I can finally get online during the day again! It's incredible how much u can miss it untill u don't have it. Although my days are filled with the joys of Luc and his bodily functions....yes I know, the bliss of it is mind boggling....I had the luxury and I really appreciate the LUXURY of having a laptop upstairs here to pop on and check things out or play silly games or chat with a friend, check mail etc when ever I want. Since getting Luc, (already one whole year ago this month!) I can't go downstairs to my desk and PC there, I have to be near Luc at all times. My laptop was my entertainment...because frankly, daytime TV is for the birds.

Anyway, my laptop went poof in Aug so I could only get online late at night to check mail and what ever else but frankly after my long days I was very tired and went to bed except for a choice few times there were friends online.

ENTER new laptop!!! Chris was all for us getting a new one, he felt bad that my days were so long when he was at work. He's my hero. We are still going to get the other one repaired if it can be done by a friend, otherwize it would cost to much to repair elsewhere...then Chris will use that one for himself although he can use this one anytime he wants lol.

So yes I am back and to put a little colour on this page, I am going to post some pics of what has been keeping me busy for the past month or so fur balls...

Seems that the little one has to sit on the big one everychance she gets. At first Shinoo (big one) would move and growl but she finally just gave up and puts up with it now. Can u see the (I just give up) look on her face?

I was going to post more pics but for some reason blogger doesn't want me too right now. I am thankful I was able to put atleast 2. Next post will have a few more and I also want to finally show u my BLING BLING..I took a pic of my ring so stay tuned lol.

Tuesday, October 04, 2005


Yes, I finally have some photos of my daughter's redone room. Stupid me forgot to take a before pic but luckily I have one from over a year ago taken when we had company and the kids were in her bedroom so it will give u a pretty good idea of the drastic changes made. Now its a far more mature yet still a funky room for a teen. Let me know what u think.


That gives u some idea..I know I should have taken some before starting lol. It's hard to see but behind the bunk bed the wall is a salmon coloured floral wall paper. It was there when I bought this house.....hense Cleo's desire to change her room these last few years lol....... Keep in mind that I had to eliminate most of her furniture to make room for a piano. We were very fortunate that my father bought her one this summer because she showed a big interest in wanting to learn. I just don't have the house for it so it had to fit in her room or not at all. We totally reorganized her closet with shelves and baskets and with just enough space to hang a few things along with something to hold her belts and ties and the few caps she all fits and has a home along with the DIRTY clothes she has no excuse leave anything on the floor...(again famous last words!!!)


The only thing left to put in there is a desk type thing we ordered to put her tv and vcr/dvd player in. It is the only corner of the room I didn't take pics of. Other then that u get a basic idea. I used closet organizers from sears to do the wall treatment on eachside of her bed. Not as pricey as ordering real furniture..I think it kinda makes the bed look like a built in. Also all the shelves and little drawers gives her lots of space to put niknaks and books. I also love the 2 floating shelves above her bed also..they are very sturdy btw, no danger of falling..they are from ikea. I think her room turned out really cool if I do say so myself.

Wednesday, September 07, 2005


My laptop needs fixing so I haven't been online in the last week. I have a pc downstairs but I can not come down here during the day while Luc is up and frankly when I put him to bed after a long day I an zonked lol. Chris started training for his supervisors position this week so he is working weekdays now and has weekends home. Seems so odd lol. I actually look forward to him going back to the weekend schedule. I much prefer him being home 4 days a week then only 2 but hey thats just me lol.

Lots of stuff has happened in the last 2 weeks. I got totally screwed around by a company that is supposed to service and maintain my cooling and heating system. I signed a contract with them in May for the express reason of not having to worry about it.....first clue that something is wrong, they totally screw with me for 3 weeks on the phone, never once giving me a date they will send someone for repairs and never calling back when they said they of now, they have been send a registered letter written by us , to cancel our contract due to services not rendered and another registered letter with a copy of my official complaint report filed with the OFFICE OF CONSUMER PROTECTION or BETTER BUSINESS BUREAU....we will see how that turns out.
Since we have officially done that, Chris decided to fix it himself...(hadn't wanted to try before for fear of reprisal from service company yada yada) Since my dad was here a few days he and Chris were pretty sure it was just in need of a new thermostat. Well we got one and Chris sat down and read everything thouroughly and VOILA he totally fixed the thing!!! HE IS MY HEROOOOOOO!!!

Also...we promised my daughter that we would redo her room after we got back from holidays. Her and my niece removed most of the ugly wall paper on both was on there when I bought this house but before now it had never been a big priority to do her room. She will be 15 on the 20th of this month and she did great on the summer class she had to take so now is the time. She chose her colours and we went from there. I sold her big bunk bed that was a huge space eater and the other furniture she had. I got a trundle kind of bed but its not a drawer bed, its a matress that is underneath but when u pull it out, it pops up to same level as the other bed to make a king size bed. Great for company.

Cleo has shown a big interest in learning to play piano so my dad said he would buy her one. He had done the same thing for my sister's daughter a few yrs back and wanted to do the same for my daughter. I had hoped for a key bourd given I have NO ROOM for a piano in the house but she really wanted a real piano. So we went online, and found a really nice one for sale in the surrounding area...Chris did some research and went to look at at and we ended up with a good piano for a great is also a decent size...considered an apartment piano laquered and actually looks great in her room against the bright green wall lol. I also found a very reputable piano teacher close to us with 30 yrs experience and Cleo has her first piano lesson yesterday. She is really excited and teacher thinks she will learn quite fast......lets hope the honeymoon of lessons continues for a while lol.

We are just waiting for a few little accent peices of shelving to arrive for her room to be done. We are waiting for one secretairy kind of desk from IKEA that she will loved that is actually a PC desk but we will use for her little tv and vcr unit...and desk part will be for doing homework. Chris totally organized her closet with shelves and we have metal baskets and such....everything fits now so there is no need for any bureau for clothing now. Her room will look sleek and be really EASY to keep clean and organized....(A MOTHER'S FAMOUS LAST WORDS!)

As soon as the last peice is in I am taking pics to post our handy work. I actually can't wait till its all done.

I have a few other things to write about but I will keep them for later. Given my long windedness I will give u all a break for now lol. HUGS to all who still bear with me 0x0x0x

Wednesday, August 17, 2005


We got back lastnight from our 2 weeks away and returned officially engaged!!
Chris decided to get down on bended knee and finally propose while we were gathered at my mom's . My sister and her family was there and mom and her hubby. I had no idea he had planned it that way nor did my family. My mother was touched and later told him how much she appreciated how he honoured the family by sharing that moment with them.
OH and btw, I said YES!!!! LOL (like anyone doubted it lol)

Can u tell we are on the top of the world? HEHE.. Yes we are both very happy and yes we are on a mountain top to boot lol...we are in a resturant that is literally ontop of a mountain in Banff.

We spent precious time with my family...I will sneak a pic in here of my mom (she would so kill me lol ) shhhh no one tell her k... but my sister reads my blog so I have to ask her first if I can subject you all to her beauty...

here is my mommy

This is Brandy my sister (by adoption) and her family, taken at their lake cabin an hour from Regina in Saskatchawan...Her hubby Kirby had a great idea about us hiding behind the trees lol...their son Mason is 4 yrs old and couldn't get enough of being close to his older cousin Cleo lol

What the hell, here is a pic of my sister and her hubby...she can sue me if she wants lol....

In fact I will save her the trouble of sending me a retort by posting this pic I know she will appreciate lol....I love you too sis.

I noticed as I loaded all the video and photo's taken with my new little cam corder that I was more often filming things then taking actual pictures...from the magestic rockies

to the splendid prairies of Saskatchawan.....

There is so much to see in Canada with something special in each province , I was only in Alberta and Sask this trip...I have far more video then pics but I will be sure to add more eventually.

After all this, the thing to remember is WE ARE ENGAGED!!! Finally after 3 1/2 yrs of waiting ...damn, at 42 yrs old, I am not getting any younger lol....bout time I actually had a ring on that finger in this lifetime haha!!!

hugs 0x0x0x

Saturday, July 30, 2005


With all thats going on with Luc coming out of the hospital, being biten by a dog, meetings with personelle from a number of health care sectors ie; ergo therapist, liazon nurse, physio-therapists, case workers, public curator, hospital escort for brief Luc visit at home for evaluation....bla bla bla bla.....I am on OVER DRIVE....
AND.. I have to pack for my vacation ....our flights leave on Monday aug 1st, same day that Luc comes home from hospital. Luckily I have my sitter taking over and with all the needs that luc has , there will be another person put in place full time to help her. I am lucky my sitter used to be a case worker who is now retired ...she is more then able to do it without me. The extra help is being furnished by my is for an indefinate period but will only change when Luc is more able to do what he used to, like walk etc. Seems like I am taking off at the worst possible time but I can't help it and they all understand. Our flights have been booked for 3 months, and payed for...not cheep believe me. Almost 3,ooo$ for the 3 of us to cross the country hense the reason I don't make the trip often.

I haven't seen my mother for 6 years nor my sister and her family. Needless to say I can't wait. Last time I saw sis, she was pregnant with her 2nd child Hayden and although I have seen many a cute photo of him or heard him on the phone, he just finished kindergarden and I have yet to meet him or him meet his outstandingly beautiful and brilliant aunt Monette .........(ok, ok, pick yourselves up off the floor!) . His sister, my niece Tess, was 7 and my daughter was 9 when we were there last. When kids are that age another 6 yrs later makes a BIG DIFFERENCE . They go from children to TEENS! in one large leep and bound. I know my daughter has changed. She is abit on the goth side so wears black and lots of skulls on her clothes but she isn't over the top nor does she over do her makeup..its nice and simple. I like her style and encourage her to express herself rather then freak out and try to change her. Funny how that seems to tame her more rather then less given she knows she doesn't have to REBEL lol. I know though that a few of her clothing choises will make my mom's eyebrows arch for sure lol. I am just happy that Cleo is quite modest...I prefer her style one hundred times more then all the *girly girls out there that have their mid section naked, such low cut pants your afraid they'll fall down, or cleavage sprouting tops with their little squish up bras lol. Cleo looks prudish next to them lol.

Besides seeing my family, they will be seeing Chris for the first time. There again, they have spoken to him or seen in on photos with me over the last 3 yrs but they haven't had the pleasure of meeting this special man in my life. I just know my mom is gonna love him and sis and her hubby will just really appreciate that he speaks english too lol. My ex only spoke french. I also can't wait for Chris to see the great town of Cochrane where we will be that is close to Calgary. We will also see some of banff and the rockies and just being in Alberta will give him a different taste of Canada not yet seen by him.

After a week there, my dad is coming to get us at my sister's place to then drive us to his place 8 hours away in Saskatawan. Regina to be exact. Dad has met Chris a few times now since he comes out east to see me and my other sister who is in Ottawa. But my brother Andre or step sister Brandy along with there partners haven't met Chris and they too will find that Cleo has really grown. Btw my daughter will be 15 in sept but is also 2 inches taller then my 5'4'' hight.

On the ground, Saskatawan is one of the flattest provinces in the country. As monatone as it can be to drive for miles and miles and feel like you haven't moved an inch through the endless fields and farm harvests, it is one of the most beautiful provinces seen from the air. It resembles a wonderfully colourful patch work quilt. All squares and rectangles perfecty fitted into eachother to produce a spectacular view that is another jewel belonging to our country and a true testiment to the hard working farmers.

I am looking forward to all of it. But mostly in sharing it with Chris for the first time. He will also see the tiny town in Sask where I was born. We alway end up there to visit an aunt and uncle. The last time I was there I was able to see my grandfather, he has since past away at the ripe old age of 99.

So as I prepare to embark on our trip , I am excited , nervous , and forever checking all my lists so I don't forget to pack anything. We have presents for everyone , some that Chris bought in Paris when he was there in april and some from here. Can't forget anyone or their kids lol. I love it!!!

I am bringing my laptop along so Cleo can play some games on the plane and amuse herself with it while at my dad's since there is no one her age around. I may do an update or load a pic or 2 .

Hugs all

Thursday, July 28, 2005

Your First Thought if someone said..MY EX'S DOG BIT ME could be...

Holy crap, how did he get it to do that?
Good Dog!
Wish my dog could do that!
Do you have his trainers number?
Who told you my fantasy!!

Well if you had any of the above your would all be WRONG lol. But my ex's dog actually did bite me.
My ex and I actually have a great relationship, afterall we share equal custody of our daughter so it makes everyones life easier. Anyway, while Michel is away on vacation, I don't mind taking care of his dog, it's also my daughter's so she is happy too. Rex the dog , is a pretty mild 4 yr old golden retriever. Sometimes though, he has a mind of his own.

Yesterday, we were expecting the delivery of a hospital bed for when Luc comes home from hospital so we wanted the dogs outside on the deck so they wouldn't be in the way. Rex started to let us know he didn't want to go out so he growled at us. Chris and I both were pointing to the door and repeating firmly to go out. He again growled. I love dogs and I have never been biten by one so I haven't developed a *healthy fear* of them. So given he wasn't listening and I did not want him to think he was boss and not us, I went to get his collar to bring him out manually. WRONG!! he was already on the defensive and I just made him scared by that approuch and him not being in his own invirement he snapped. He bite my left hand...HARD...actually knawed on it 4 or 5 times. I had the right reflex to not pull away but waited till he was done then held my hand to my chest and walked to the sink. YES I am tough lol...but it was all in front of my daughter as well so I didn't want to cry or freak out to upset her even more then she was after seeing her dog do that to her mom.

Luckily on the top of my hand I had lots of teeth marks but none peirced the skin, but underneath on the fat part of my palm , one of his big k-9 teeth went it's whole length in my hand. The cut is a centimetre long. Doesn't sound like much but the tooth in question is a long sucker so it went deep.

I knew that the dogs vacinations were not up to date so in the midst of getting calls from Luc's caseworker, waiting for the hospital bed to arrive, talking back and forth with the physicotherapist at the hospital...I had to go wait my turn at the clinic for a tetanious shot! OH the joy!

I was lucky, I only waited a little over an hour. Got my shot in the arm and was given a perscription for 5 days of antibiotics just in case but also had to go to another clinic for a hand xray given the whole thing is so tender. It turned out to be ok so PHEW... thats all I need before Luc comes home and I go on vacation..a broken fricken hand.

Anyway..I have a tender purplish hand but as u can see, it can still type lol. I called Michel to let him know what happened and to see if I was correct about his vacination history and I was. But most of all, contrary to what most would think.......He WASN'T happy that his dog bit me lol.

It was really my fault and Rex's too......I learned my lesson all in still liking the dog.

By law the clinic have to report a dog bite and there is a follow up. I got a call today from the ppl who follow it up and I am not worried about Rex.. he has no signs of rabies so far and they will just call Michel next week to confirm his health.

I have to wonder if someone told them how nuts I am to think I could give a dog rabies after he bites me?....KIDDING! ........I know it doesn't work that way lol.

Wednesday, July 20, 2005


I got this in an e-mail..I had seen it before and it was as funny now as it was then so I wanted to share it with those who may not have read it before ....enjoy lol.

A man walked into the ladies department of a Macy's and shyly walked up to the woman behind the counter and said, "I'd like to buy a bra for my wife.
"What type of bra?" asked the clerk.
"Type?" inquires the man, "There's more than one type?
"Look around," said the saleslady, as she showed a sea of bras in every shape, size, color and material imaginable. "Actually, even with all of this variety, there are really only four types of bras to choose from.
" Relieved, the man asked about the types.
The saleslady replied: "There are the Catholic, the Salvation Army, the Presbyterian, and the Baptist types. Which one would you prefer?
" Now totally befuddled, the man asked about the differences between them. The Saleslady responded,
"It is all really quite simple...
The Catholic type supports the masses.
The Salvation Army type lifts the fallen,
The Presbyterian type keeps them staunch and upright, and
The Baptist makes mountains out of mole hills.

" Have you ever wondered why A, B, C, D, DD, E, F, G, and H are the letters used to define bra sizes? If you have wondered why, but couldn't figure out what the letters stood for, it is about time you became informed!
(A} Almost Boobs...
{B} Barely there.
{C} Can't Complain!
{D} Dang!
{DD} Double dang!
{E} Enormous!
{F} Fake.
{G} Get a Reduction.
{H} Help me, I've fallen and I can't get up ! Send this to all that will appreciate it!
They forgot the German bra.

Sunday, July 17, 2005

Stills from the Camcorder

These are the stills I took with my new camcorder, not bad eh.
The white flower is a perennial climber that winds up the pergola.
The orangy/red ones and the yellow and white/pink flowers are new perennials I just planted..aren't awesome! They are (lilium/crimson pixie),(lilium/butter pixie) and (lilium/lollypop).
The gorgeous purple one is a Iris(gusto) and last but not least, this red edged yellow daisy like perennial is a gaillardia(goblin)

These are my new additions perennial wize this year I normally buy smaller plants but we got most of these at a great price so jumped on them.

Saturday, July 16, 2005


Well since my last post Luc has remained in hospital. It has been more then 2 weeks now. Although he isn't home for me to care for him, I have been going to see him almost everyday except weekends when Chris is at work. I can say that Luc not being here has lessened my load considerably that's for has been a well needed repreave if I do say so myself...I just wish it had been under better circumstances for Luc. It has been nice to just be able to go out of the house during the day while my other guy Martin is off at his work or other outings.

I am really impressed by the staff that has been caring for Luc...after this much time, they all know what to expect now in terms of comprehension etc but even given that they are very caring and patient. He is being walked 4 times a day now, it still takes 2 persons to do it because he still isn't putting much weight on his left leg so he lets them basically carry him. It is a very slow process so far, but given his level of intellect it isn't surprising. I am releaved though that my employers understand that as he is now, I am not able to care for him alone. I would need a hospital bed also and restaints in order to make sure he doesn't rip off his diaper or just basic help in moving him around. He may not be a big man but alone with a dead weight I would hurt my back in no time.

As of today, my other border left for one week to be with his parents YAY!!! so its a mini holiday for me as long as Luc is in hospital. Let me tell ya, he has been a real challenge lately. As high functioning as he is, he has been rude, abrupt, ornery and just a major pain lately...he has always had those traits and been very munipulative over the 10 yrs I have had him but being 34 now, seems like he is going through the adolescent stage now..(being slow, makes sense to me that it would hit him now)....I would seriously trade Martin for another Luc believe it or not. I am so sick of arguing and putting up with bad attitude compared to Luc who is more work physically but mentally he doesnt complain or talk back or bitch lol. I am certainly going to saveur this short repreave of silence.

Other news, our puppy is doing great. Since we started epileptic meds, she hasn't had a siezure so she is a healthy happy dog. I have to give a heads up about the store we bought her at, SAFARI totally respected their store policy. If their vet found a medical condition that needed meds, the guarentee stipulated that they would pay for the meds up to the price of the dog. So instead of being billed for yrs for the meds our dog needs, they opted to refund the whole amount and be taken out of the dossier. This way we just take care of the meds, which luckily are very inexpensive so the other day we had over $800 credited to my credit card by the store. We have a pure breed bichon maltais for free lol.
Gotta love a store that backs up their promises.

With having more time out of the house, we have been looking for trundle beds for my daughters room, we are hoping to decorate her room after we get back from holidays. She currently has a bunk bed with the futon couch underneath. It seems like an elephant in her room, so I want a trundle bed for when her cousin comes spend time here or when I have company. She has wanted to change the decor in that room since I bought this house but it wasn't a priority. This year she will be 15 in sept, and she has definate ideas of what she wants and they are quite good if I do say so myself lol.

We bought a camcorder this week....$$$$$...but it is the kind that uses the small DVD's instead of the cassettes and it has enough pixels 3.0 to be exact that it can take some decent pics aswell so I don't have to use carry around the camera too. Ultimately my digital camera has been sent to repair and we got word back that Kodak will send me a new camera of same quality or better instead of repairing it but it could take a month before I get it. Hense I wouldn't have a camera to go on holiday with. I haven't seen my mom and her hubby or my sister and her family in over 6 years so there was no way in hell I was going out there in 2 weeks WITHOUT a camera. I am selling my old camcorder to my ex for 2oo$ so that can be put back into the price of this new one and when I do eventually get my digital camera replaced I know I will uses it often anyway. I am going to do some filming this afternoon with the new one to get the feel of how it works and see if I can post on here with something lol...don't hold your breath, this could take awhile lol.

Well all, thanks for being patient.....till next episode...

Saturday, July 02, 2005


WELL...thursday was quite the day. Most of my friends know that I have 2 mentally and physically handicapped adult clients that live here full time. One is high functioning so he gets around, goes out, has a social life, plays baseball ect. My other guy is like a 40 yr old baby that is blind, mute and severely mentally difficient. He can hear but only understands a few words, he walks so he is always bumping his way around as much as I try to prevent that he has a good idea now where the bathroom is in relation to his chair in the kitchen...he goes back and forth most of the day.I bath him, shave him, brush his teeth, feed him purree food like a baby.

Thursday was a day like most...except ...instead of going in the direction of the bathroom like a million times before, he went in the direction of the front door, where there is 2 steps down..(about 1 1/2 feet deep). When Luc decides to get up, he does it in a flash but this time I just happen to have gone out on the deck to put something on the table so I couldn't prevent his fall into the (Hole)at the front door, as we call it. When I got back in the house he was squating quietly leaning against the door. I helped him up, and although he lacked a bit of equilibrium, it was not out of the ordinary. His doctor and I have been working on getting his meds at a good level etc so I just figured he was a little sore from falling combined with his already present lack of balance. I got him to his chair and all seemed ok.

About an hour later, he gets up to go to the bathroom, but again, he stands there, but I can tell he is having slight issues, so I help him on the toilet and he assumes his normal side ways sitting with feet on the seat and rocks. ...Gets up later, so I help him, now he is abit heavier, leaning more on me. I sit him down, and do my things around the house as usual. Later he gets up to go to bathroom again, but halfway his legs or leg seem to give out, he is really leaning on my now, I get him to toilet he assumes position as usual.I really examine as much on Luc has I can in terms of his ankles, knees, arms, legs, to see if there are any visible signs. Remember that Luc does not speak, nor does he cry. He kinda growls when he is agitated but thats it. He will fight if he doesnt want to do something but he can't tell us if he is in pain or cry etc.

I had planned to go out and get some shopping down, Cosco, errands etc so the sitter arrives. She is the retired case worker who became my sitter. She knows Luv I tell what happened, and as I do, I go get him out of the bathroom. Now Luc is having major probs letting any weight down on his left leg. So we sit him down and decide that I will go do some stuff and if anything gets worse she can call us on the cell anyway. We both examine him again together and see nothing that can indicate either way whats wrong.

We went to eat supper with my daughter then dropped her and her friend off. We went back home just to check on Luc. He was getting worse so we decided to call the emergency number for the the PPl I work for to let them know I was going to call an ambulance to transport him to the hospital. The guy oncall is one of the big wigs, says, is it really necissary to use an ambulance? I said, listen, if he has a broken ankle or knee or hip ( I was pretty sure it was the hip)I will not take any chances of trying to get him in a vehicle when we are not sure whats wrong, and in doing so, jeopordize him even more. Bla Bla Bla!! (Jasus, it seems obvious to me wtf?)

So call 911, state situation but because he isn't dying, we wait an over an hour for them to arrive. I will say it was Thurs evening with Friday being Canada day so was a long weekend for all. They had quite a few emergencies happening and priority goes to the more serious cases. I totally understand that. So...they arrive, and get him all bundled up, by this time our Luc is tired to say the least, I am thinking both for reasons of being past his bedtime and his body dealing with the pain he can't express. Normally he would have been fighting like a banchi with the EMT's and I to get him on the stretcher.

I ride with him in the ambulance while Chris drives after us. Luckily Marthe is staying to sit for our other client untill we can come back home.

As always, I have to explain *Luc to everyone we see. Even then, it's like they don't *Hear me when I say he is blind, mute, and has the brain capacity of a baby. I just finished telling one nurse the blind part when she takes the light thingy out , opens an eyelid to see his pupils...and is like taken aback that all u see is white cataracts....(eye role, on my part) HELLO! I just told you. ...she's like...OH right sorry.

Then Mr doctor comes in, and I start all over. He kinda scratches his head, says, he seems fine to me etc. I again state that he can't complain, cry, or show us where it hurts, but I know the client, and I also know that a few simple xrays will show us whats wrong....doc hesitates, so I again insist that I am sure its his hip but I am not the doctor. Please just xray him, I am his only voice...I know he is cocooned right now and quiet because he is in pain. So finally doc relents and orders xrays!!!

I realize all these ppl deal with hundreds of problems everyday, they are over worked, tired and hear hords of stories about this that and the other. I just wish it wasn't such a struggle to be understood, given I am a caretaker of a person like Luc. Give me some reasonable credit for knowing said client for god sakes.

Chris and I even put on the lead vests to hold him in all the different positions for the xrays....low and behold.....A BROKEN HIP!!! gee go figure eh! Who woulda thunk it?

Atleast when we see the doc an hour later, he said to me, MAN u were right, he has a broken hip. I say, in a straight face...OHHH YAY FOR ME... but then we both smiled. He got the message. I didn't want to be right, I would have preffered Luc not have a broken hip and the doc also realized I knew what I was talking about in reference to Luc. So we find out that he will need to be operated on but after that, normally a person has rehab to do but he scratched his head, looked at Luc and I don't know what to tell u about him. I really take my hat off to u ppl for being caretakers of a patient like this.

That was kind of him. We then talked about the steps that has to be taken. I can not sign anything regarding Luc being under the public Curator's care etc. Now it becomes complicated. We say all we can, then talk to the nurse about Luc, making sure she knows how to give him his pills, we show her how, but tell her that they have to watch him like a hawk. If he decides to kinda wake up, he will jump out of the hospital bed, sides up or not , broken hip or not, and hurt himself more. As soon as apparent, they must tie him up for his own security poor little man.

I can't stay there as I have to relieve our sitter and be home for Our other guy. I tell them all I can about Luc, and leave all the numbers to call, including mine if they need any info etc, then I go out to call the Big Wig again to make sure I have done all correctly. He says yes...but I say, what happens now? I can't come to see him on the weekend as my partner works sat, sun, monday...he then says, "Ya but u could take a taxi" (it is 20 klm's).....Ok, but I have another client at home....."Oh well ya, ok. So you told them all u could about the client? His behaviors and needs etc?" ...YES... "Well he is no longer our's now their charge..and they deal with the curator bla bla bla bla. Monday morning call your caseworker and let her know what happened etc thats all"
I ask him if I should keep him updated on Luc over the weekend and he says, "No thats ok, unless it's an emergency"

I am thinking that these feking paper pushers are real good at making damn sure they invade our lives with all their ideas on caring for our clients this way, and that way, and we want u to try this intervention and that intervention, or all measures of control are bad unless we think otherwise ie; the baby fense I have in the hallway at night so Luc didn't keep falling in the *hole like he did evertime he got lost from taking a piss at night. We had to fight for that so he would be safer etc. I altimately happened during the day anyway, and he broke his hip but hey..I can only do so much. I was beating myself up all ways possible about this, I still feel bad but like everyone said so far, I could have been taking a piss, making his bed, stiring a bot at the stove and it could have happened or just taking something outside like I was, and boom , it would have happened. Now we deal. What I can't believe is how feking easy it was for the Big Wig to wash his hands of the client, like yesterdays bread, just because he could. Leave it to them now, they are responsible for him bla bla bla..makes me sick I tell ya.

We ended up leaving the hospital at aprox 2:30 am. We updated the sitter, saw her off, went to bed and slept like dead ppl for 12 hours straight. First time in 9 months since we got Luc that we were able to sleep in. I would have preffered that under different circumstances but it was a much needed rest nevertheless.

We went back friday, for a few hours, he had aready had surgery luckily. On Canada Day no less lol...he was quiet, but drugged, and hands tied, because he had tried earlier to rip IV out and stitches. While there they were happy I could help with how to give him his pills (different department, diff personel) and I gave them more info about LUc...I left my number that was apparently lost, for them to call me anytime for any advice etc.

Today, Marthe the sitter calls me, she went to see him, and calls from hospital, to pass me the nurse on the phone. They didn't know what to do about Luc etc, and were so happy to see Marthe, someone who knew him when she arrived...she told them what they needed but offered to give my number again, because I am the caregiver ect...SHEESH!!! so I talk to a diff nurse on phone, she is like, its good to have help, I tell her that I spend 2 hours the day before with another nurse and left my number to call anytime they needed to ask anything bla bla bla...but I just couldnt make any dicisions concerning healthcare or sign anything, the curator is in charge etc.

Jasus, seems to me, they don't take notes or talk to the person taking over the next feking shift for god sakes!!...I feel helpless and frustrated and pissed at how there seem to be so many loose ends in the system. I can't believe they have so little clue about special needs clients and then again, the agency that governs me has its head up it's own ass about the client too, so why am I so surprised!

As things are now, I am inclined to believe there will be a hospital bed here in future as long as he has stitches etc, in order to restain him at night safely , day time is another story...I guess I will go over that bridge when the time comes.

Thanks for hearing my vent, I needed to write this all out as much to relieve tention as to get it down on paper to remember small details. Please give a thought to our little man Luc to get well soon. He has no voice or thoughts of his own to express his needs or wants. Let's hope this little tough man makes it home soon.

Saturday, June 25, 2005


A few of our friends know that Chris applied internally for another job. He is presently an analyst in a pharmacutical company. He works weekends 12 hours a day and mondays for 8 hours. We LOVE this schedule because he is home 4 days a week. It's pretty decent especially given the job I do at home, he helps me alot. The down side is he has wanted to get away from analysis and working with chemicals.

He had an idea he would get a promotion in the lab but it also meant going back to an old schedule of evenings, 5 days a week. YUCK! I know one shouldn't complain but when he did that schedule in the past, it seemed like he was never home. Not to mention 4 more trips a week, more gas, wear and tear on a vehicle at 45 mins each way sure adds up in a year.

SO, he decided to apply for another weekend posting. Like he said, although it was a big jump up, he had nothing to lose from trying. It took 3 different interviews, fingers crossed, long waiting for the answer. Always assuming he wouldn't get it because others in the plant who were higher up then Chris didn't even get it. We knew who HADN'T gotten it oddly enough but Chris didn't get any info on his status either way. This is a Supervisor's position in production over the weekends...only diff with the schedule is that he will be working Fridays instead of Mondays...WORKS FOR ME lol

We got the news this week that he GOT THE JOB!!!

Then we had to wait another day for the official OFFER on paper. You know, the pertinent information like WHAT IT PAYS! and all that good stuff.

When it came in, we had to read it more then once. Then we jumped up and down with glee like 2 idiots in the living room. It basically works out that he will get a 43% raise!!! IS THAT COOL OR WHAT?! AND that doesn't even include the 10% bonus at year end!....We are thrilled to say the least on so many levels. The schedule and the pay increase. I am so proud of Chris. His present boss even tryed to offer him more money to stay in his department but he couldn't compete with the schedule. It would have been the evening shift 5 days. He declined but it was nice to know he was very appreciated nonetheless. He is not sure when he starts the new job, it's a matter of replacing him where he is so it could go till summers end.

We have been having alot of fun Chris and I, joking about his title etc. I have been calling him Mr Supervisor and he has been saying JUST CALL ME SUPER FOR SHORT lol...or when we went shopping I chose a nice pair of pants, and he says, U can buy them, your a SUPERVISORS partner now lol...and on and on...he is just so tickled about getting this job and I have to add, he has a spring in his step and I think he even stands a little taller. He is NOT a braggard or egomaniac..he is actually very humble, I AM THE ONE WHO LOVES TO BRAG ABOUT HIM and as far as I am concerned, he is a constant fountain of bragging material....


Friday, June 17, 2005


Finally got a few more pics of puppy. Had to share some lol. Last and final update about her health is she is officially epileptic but oddly enough it's good news. The vet initially thought it was a more serious problem that caused the siezures and would eventually cause her death within a few months. Happily after all the tests, the vet was wrong so Clochette will be with us a long time. The meds for epileptsi are not expensive and have already got her siezures under control so we are very pleased. Now all we have to do is convince our other dog Shinoo that Clochette is here to stay and to stop pouting about it already lol........she will come around but the head strong bitch is taking her sweet time about it.......Hope u enjoy the pics.
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