Monday, May 28, 2007


YES...I'm sure many can relate. Shopping for a bra is no fun...NO FUN!...These Over The Shoulder Boulder Holders are the most inconsistant when it comes to size. If you change brand names, forget about trying the same size from one brand to the other. OY VEY... all I want is some more support for my shrinking orbs of joy. They need better harnessing in order to not cause bodily harm while on the dreaded treadmill. Granted I can no longer legally call them Planets of Pleasure. Hense the need for new bondage of sorts for these petered out pectorals?

I swear I tryed on a gazillion bras...expensive to pricey, I don't care what they cost as long as they are comfy and fit properly. I have to alter (MACHINE SEW) the straps on my old ones to hold the knockers up higher which is fine but I wanted a cpl new ones for actually leaving the house lol. Oddly enough some cheapys fit best, so I got 2. Given that I will have to revisit this torturous process over the course of the next yr I'm thankfull it is cost affective.

Another bane of my existance lately is massive hairloss. Not normal, (it's spring shedding time) hair loss. This is hands full of hairloss. Reams of folical anarchy!
Why? Well, seems it's common among many who have had weightloss surgery. From 3 to 5 months after surgery, body goes into starvation mode, hense it rebells and starts store food, and cause major hairloss. PPl can loose up to 50% of there hair..not the normal 10% we lose on a regular basis. Hense my initial panic when I started seeing hands full of hair in the shower then more when combing out then again brushed full after styling...u can now see my scalp alot easier. I don't have a thick head of hair to start with. Most are deceaved because it's very curly..but straightened, it's very thin.

I have to up my protein intake. To try to stop it and to try to ironically lose wieght. I have been at a stand still since my 50 lbs loss. I vary between 50 and 53 lost. Dispite getting on the treadmill 6 days a week. It's frustrating for sure.

WHY, OH WHY...I ask, does all hair loss have to be in the places we don't want it to vacate?

WHY OH WHY can't nature do us some favours by letting those areas we constantly tend too just miraculously dissappear?

U know the places....mustache, armpits, legs, nether areas...or those ever appearing chin hairs u swore weren't there yesterday but seem to have grown an inch during the night!

I swear when that happens I have visions of Repunzal Repunzal, throw down your hair!!!...At the rate of chin hair growth, I would bet the author of that story actually came up with it due to some chin hair.

Any way to make a short story pun intended....I was telling a nurse friend of mine about my hairloss. She found an article written by a woman who had the same thing...I have since found many myself. A product recommended was Silica Complex...made huge difference and stopped the hairloss and promoted healthy regrowth. I looked for it here but to no avail. I have since ordered it online. Hope to get it soon. Won't hurt to try anyway along with taking more protien. Hopefully I won't be bald by the time we leave next month for Chicago.

I will be pulling my hair out untill it gets here I guess!

Thursday, May 24, 2007


It seems like just yesterday that I was holding her in my arms ....oh wait, I did hold her in my arms yesterday...just not as a little baby. Time certainly flys by! My baby will be graduating from highschool this time next Thursday. I can hardly believe it.

She is 16, so rather young but she was always the youngest in her class because of her birthday. For those who don't know, Quebec grades are different from the rest of canada or north america, they use a different system which translates to only doing 11 yrs, rather then 12. Elementary school is basically the same, grades 1 to 6 then when they start highschool it starts over with Secondary 1, Secondary 2 and so on, till Secondary 5 , the year they graduate and go onto college. Most kids graduating are 17 or 18. Cleo is 16 now, will be 17 in Sept.

I think she has grown the most in the last year. We have had many ups and down as teenage martrdome progesses but she made some very valid points over that journey and a few misguided mistakes which also goes with the territory. We have many more hills to climb but we we take one step at a time.

I am liking the woman she is becoming. She has her own style and way about her. She likes to be different and does not fit any group mold or limit herself to ppl in said molds. There are so many specific *groups* in schools now, Fresh, Punk, Goth etc etc...she tends to be on the goth side of style but has always had friends from all groups unlike many. She looks forward to college to meet new ppl of all walks of life. She is going into the arts and being the free spirit she is I think she will do well if she pushes herself to do her best.

She aches to be on her own, didn't we all at that age. I look forward to seeing her grow and learn lifes lessons while trying to be supportive without breathing down her neck. Not always easy as a mom I think.

I just had to post pics of my baby. Yes I am one of THOSE moms lol.

3 months old..

Cleo at aprox 8 weeks old

Last June, 15 yrs old


June 06, 15 yrs old

My daughter, the gothic princess

15 yrs old , from our wedding pics


Most recent pic, last month visiting her cousin in hospital. 16 yrs old.

Chantal & Cleo

How they grow up so fast. Moments, minutes, snapshots in time. All meld together to seem like yesterday and u wonder where the time has gone.

Sunday, May 20, 2007


Chris and I had a great day Thursday. We drove 3 hours to Quebec City to spend the day. Why? Well...My Aunt Simone and Uncle Ed were on a cruise across north america and one of their stops was for more then a day in the port of Old Quebec. They live in BC (British Columbia) totally across the country. I hadn't seen my aunt in aprox 14 yrs when she came out east with my cousin then for a short visit. My uncle hadn't seen me in about 28 yrs. So yes we had all changed abit lol.

These are my godparents. I spend alot of time with them and my cousins (3 boys) growing up in small town Fernie BC. Fernie is a skiing town in the BC rockies. I have some great memories of going on small trips with them to the US . The first time I had breakfast in a resturant was with them and I remember when the waitress asked me how I wanted my eggs, I dumfoundly looked at her and said ''FRIED''... I had no idea what sunny side up was etc lol and u can bet my cousins gaffawed with laughter at me.

Also one short weekend trip, my aunt was perplexed as she saw my bag of clothes for the one overnight outting. I was trying to decide what to wear so she came and laughingly started counting the tops I brought with me. I had 13 tops...yes 13 tops! I was so worried I wouldn't have the right thing I think I brought my whole top wardrobe. I was about 12 yrs old and she STILL hasn't let me live it down lol.

My Uncle still tells the story of my empting a hotel pool and leaving a chip on the bottom when I jumped in the shallow end and hit my chin. Still have the scar to prove it. Could have been worse...but since it was minor we have always laughed about it.

So it was great to see them both and have them meet my husband Chris who they loved. We took in the sights together and had fun reminising about the old days. Showing pictures of my cousins and their children while I brought my wedding book to share with them.

I have added a bunch of pics here of us and some commercial ones I found on Old Quebec to share where we walked etc. Only because we talked so much that we often forgot to take pics lol. I hope u enjoy the tour. It's such a great place to visit and the Oldest part of North America!

In the lobby of Chateaux Frontenac In Old Quebec

Matante Simone & Moi

This is a very cool mural painted on a wall there.

Mural, Old Quebec

In front of the Basilica about 30 mins from Quebec in Sainte_Anne_de_Beaupré

Simone & Ed & I

This is the ship they sailed in on. The Maastadamn. They love curises but this particular one was given to them by their 3 boys last yr for their 50th wedding anniversay.


Signs in Old Quebec

Old Quebec street signs

We went up this elevator u see to be above where the Chateau is.

Elevator that goes up to the Chateaux in Old Quebec

So there u have it. We had a great day. The only thing that could have made it better is being able to see the inside of the ship but although my aunt and uncle asked...they were told that it was not possible. Only those with boarding passes could enter. Oh well, they tried.

Old Quebec City

Thursday, May 10, 2007


Yes, I finally past the 50 lbs off mark!! Whoo hooo...took longer then I thought though. I wasn't able to get on the treadmill for almost a month due to the prolonged broncitis and 2 series of antibiotics..glad thats over.

As you can see, the green pants are abit on the big side now lol. I can remove them without undoing them now. I will keep them as my fat pants lol. If I ever put them on again, it will be after ALL the weight is off to see if I can fit both legs in one pant leg.

The top hangs alot now too, it's hard to tell how much more room there is in there now, with it being black.

Ok, the funny side is ofcourse that gravity is taking over my body...things are being pulled towards the earth so to speak. My orbs of joy or rather, planets of pleasure are becoming flattened asteroids...I will soon have to roll them up to put in bra cups lol.

I really don't's a bridge I will cross health is more important right now...besides...just after my surgery for the lump on my back...Chris and I were having a coffee in a resturant before going home. He says to me..''I will start calling you Jamie''

''Jamie? Why Jamie?'' I said.

''WE WILL REBUILD YOU'' he says with THAT *tone*

I almost peed myself. ...For those who are too young or don't remember ...(THE BIONIC WOMAN) LOL

If u go into flickr, click on the WEIGHT LOSS there u can see the pics set up to see the difference...all face together, front, side etc...the first shots I took before surgery to now, is remarkable the difference lol. To think I have so much more to go...My next small goal is to finally break the 200lb mark...only 12 lbs to go for that one.... I will post a pic for that for sure...but the next ones that will go in the WEIGHT LOSS folder will be at the 75lbs lost...hard to believe I will ever get there but then , I had a hard time believing I would get to 50 and here I am lol.

Thanks to all my friends & family in here and everywhere for all your kind words, encouragements and support. It makes this whole journey so much more enjoyable.

OK, I have a stupid look on my face, hard to concentrate while holding up pants lol

Sunday, May 06, 2007


You will not believe this. As I had reported, the baby was transported to another hospital because they were better equiped to deal with his undeveloped lungs.

Chantal was happily able to leave the ICU on friday morning to go up to the maternity ward. Her doctor told her however that they would keep a close eye on her liver and enimia etc, that he wouldn't let her out for quite a while yet.

Later in the day, given the baby was quite far, downtown Montreal, they decided since she needed to recover for awhile still, that it would be far better for baby and mom to have her recooperate at the same hospital as the baby. Letting her see her son and also giver him her expressed milk. By all rights, it was the best thing to do for both of them.

So friday late they transported Chantal to the same hospital her son was at. All is good right?...Next day, Chris and I planned on visiting her at the other hospital late afternoon. We had shopping for Chantal to so, and some of our own. I get a call on my cell from Chantal, asking if she can stay at our house for a few days, as they were going to discharge her from hospital but she was advised not to be alone.


OH they seemed to think she was fine, her stats were normal yada the whole point of being there was not necissary as far as they were concerned. Did I mention that her former doctor, had specifically asked that a Gastroenterologist see her while there also. No such thing happened.

So basically, by the time we got there, her bags were all packed and she was being sent on her way! As it was Sat, no one seemed around and although I wanted to speak to someone about this...I figured that nothing I would say to anyone would make a difference, since it's an allmighty doc who didn't give a shit, made that call anyway. We went to see the baby then took her home.

She took a long bath here but after that she was wiped out...very weak and I was still brissling from her treatment. Her dad was major pissed off also, he suggested she call back her first hospital and tell them she had been sent home.

She did...talked to a nurse on the maternity ward. They couldn't believe it! Told her to come back to the hospital through emergency and she would be calling her doctor at home in the mean time.

It didn't take 10 minutes for the nurse to call back. Seems her doctor was totally pissed off and said, she had to get back to the hospital asap, not even go to emergency..She was to go straight up to maternity. He had told the nurse to get a room ready for her and she was to be set up with an IV asap. Btw, she hadn't even gotten an IV in the other hospital.

When her doc found out that a gasterenterologist hadn't even seen her at the other hospital, he went balistic...we found out that he had called the doctor oncall at the other hospital and ripped him a new one lmao! FINALLY..

So lastnight she was back in a bed in the first hospital...her liver stats are still too high (wow go figure) but they are getting better. When doc found out that baby was breathing freely without aid, he has put in the order to ship him back to them so Chantal can be with him. YAY!

I am liking this doctor more and more.

She is all set up, and this brief reprieve atleast got her here long enough to have a long bath. I had all her dirty clothes and washed them. Her dad came by today to bring them to her. I had gotten her a good breast pump yesterday so she was able to bring that with her to the hospital. We are all breathing a sigh of relief that she is where she should be.

BTW, her doc, doesn't work weekends, but he went in to see Chantal today anyway. Assured her that they would be ontop of everything to make sure she is alot stronger before she went anywhere. Being as young as she is it may not take long but he was still very angry at how the other hospital handled her.

Now for the GOOD PART! YES I have pics of the baby! So enjoy.

Her is the daddy Jeff.
I just had to take a pic of his tiny little toes.
Mom and dad watching over there little boy.

Chantal with her son.

My daughter Cleo with Chantal.

Keyshawns incubator.

There he is...4 days old. Holding on to my finger. Today he would have been 34 weeks in the whomb.

Thursday, May 03, 2007


Things are looking good. Chantal is still in ICU but her liver stats are slowly climbing on the possitive side. (BIG SIGH OF RELIEF) She is still only on liquids to giver her liver an easier time to regenerate itself.
She is on alot of moraphine because of the C-section though.

My daughter and I spent 8 hours there yesterday, getting home late again but was good to be with her.

The baby who has been named Kéyshawn (pronounced Kayshawn) has however, been sent to another hospital. Being a premi, his lungs are not all formed, he was having a very hard time breathing. He was transported to a a hospital better equiped to deal with his lungs. Everything else seems fine...the nurses even took some photos of the baby for Chantal to look at since she can't go see him. She was also given a direct phone number to inquire about Kéyshawn at any time.

I have to thank all my friends on here that have given me well wishes for Chantal and baby, on here and by family and I appreciate it very much...I think positive thoughts sent out from all over, some how make a difference. It certainly can't hurt.

Wednesday, May 02, 2007


My niece Chantal who is 18 yrs old...had her baby lastnight. Yes, she is very young and we hope to be as supportive as we can.

The last 3 weeks, she has been very sick, nausia, can't eat anything, abdoman pain etc...She was admitted in to the hospital over a week ago...they thinking she had a sort of gastro. Being pregnant, she was dehydrated so she was getting fluids by intervenus....this continued for 6 days..they discharged her when she was able to eat abit of jello!....Chris picked her up from hospital and she came here. She had lost reams of weight and looked horrid...doc suggested she take hot baths to ease her abdoman pains. She did get alot of relief from them, but as soon as she was out for 30 mins, she would then, draw another bath..this went on all night poor thing.

We took her home next day. I told her to let me know if she felt better or worse. That very night she called, saying she was worse...Call 911 I told her. Her dad ended up going to her place to take her to hospital...they are in another town from us.

They admitted her again THANKFULLY... did more tests

Last night we got the call that she would have an emergency C-section...they finally figured out what she had, its very rare and called ACUTE FATTY LIVER FROM PREGANCY not many cases in the world actually the doctor said.

Her liver was at a point where it looked like one of a 50 yr old alcoholic' was degenerating so fast it could kill her and the baby. The had to do the C-section lastnight, she may not have made it through the night.

She gave birth to a little boy 4lbs 7 onzes, 17 inches long...not bad for a month early and from a mother that had lost so much weight. His breathing is difficult being a premi, and he has jauntist like his mom. He has been transported to another hospital today for his lungs.But prognosis is actually very good...and he will be returned to the hospital his mom is at as soon as he is stable.

So far Chantal is in the ICU ..she is being closely monitored...2 things can happen...her liver metabolism can start to regenerate or not. We are just waiting for blood results. She lost alot of blood lastnight also, they had to give her transfusions. The good news is already lastnight at midnight, when we were with her ..she had no more nausia and she was actually hungery...this can only be a good thing. Keeping our fingers crossed.

Her bf was with her in surgery and with us for the rest of the time. He was able to go spend time with his son, but we were not able to really see him.

I was with my daughter and Chantal's dad. He was white and scared and trying to stay calm....I knew I had to constantly reasure him...I also knew he was reliving being in the hospital when his wife died. Chantal looks the spitting image of her mom. I was glad I was there for her and him...Cleo my daughter was also afraid for her cousin...them two are like sisters...each only children, almost the same age..get on eachothers nerves lol...but love eachother dearly. Cleo is hard to console, she keeps it all in. I try to be strong for everyone, be the's easy for me because I am the lucky one. I have a husband that understands me and knows how to be my soft place to fall.

We were all relieved to say the least when we were able to be with her around midnight in the ICU... Now its prayers and time that will help her get through this. I took photos in the icu of all of us with Chantal. Like we told her, her son will need proof she went through hell to have him in the future lol. I am going back to spend this afternoon and some evening with her. I don't have any pics of baby yet..but will post some when I am able too.

This is Chantal with her bf Jeff.
Chantal and her dad Sylvain
Chantal and Cleo

Me and Chantal