Saturday, August 21, 2004


Well a few already know that I am colour blind. Some may not know however that it is EXTREMELY rare for a woman to have this afliction lol. My father is colour blind but for me to also be, my mother also carriered the gene and I guess I was the luck of the draw. Neither one of my sisters are. Oddly enough I only found out about my colour blindness aproximately 10 yrs ago and only because my daughter was being tested for pre-school and they did the coloured dots test and as she is naming off the different shapes she sees among the dots I was like....whaaaaaaa????? I didn't see that!! Wait let me have a better look!!.. the same for next page and next page lol.....I always kinda knew I had a hard time with some greens and browns but this was rediculous. Hense quickly making an appointment with my eye doc.
Some may find it incredible that I could go 30 some yrs being colour blind and not know it but think about it...we all assume that we see what others see and when I was 5 they didn't routinely give those tests to all children.
So the eye doc is going on and on about it being the first time in his 25 yrs of eye service that he has had a true blue colour blind WOMAN in his chair...I thought I was gonna get a turned out to be a dreaded confirmation that I was TRUELLY colour blind.......and to make doubly sure I was sent off to another small room with another person for a different test..this one matching pastels........OMG ..WHY DON'T U JUST BLINDFOLD ME AND LET ME HIT A BULLEYE WITH A BOW AND ARROW...........IT WOULD BE EASIER!!! ...After this was done , the lady did some calculated comparing and proceeded to then tell me a whole list of jobs I could NEVER qualify for because seeing color correctly was paramount to do these jobs....PILOT, POLICE, ELECTICIAN, BOMB DISARMERMENT!!!! At this point I stopped her...I pretended a shattered look on my face and told her my dream to be a bomb disarmer was just to hard to take....just thinking ..ok I need to cut the green wire!!! not the green wire!! was running through my mind......I will NEVER BE A BOND GIRL!!!...All kidding aside ............The nice lady did take pity on me and told me that I was dressed fine that day.....she really did lol.
I was not to know at that moment how frustrating it could be as a woman to be colour blind. I was trying to explain this to a friend by saying if u think about how its usually the women that dress their families, decorate the homes, wear makeup etc etc etc and even if the hubby isn't colour blind , most don't have much taste or care anyway lol...I am speaking generally ppl I don't mean to offend anyone.
So having said all that, I had to second guess so many things ...I wondered if I had been seen wearing outlandish outfits....clown wanna be ??? makeup days??? I had moments of panic just thinking about it lol....had to separate the cool tones and the warm tones and make sure * never the twain shall meet* and luckily when I went through my closet realized that my classic tastes made it easy to see I wasn't a walking disaster ...except for the few mistakes of (BCB) Before Colour Blindness .....refering to former story about the clothing swap and the orange outfit .......I also always liked to decorate ironically........but luckily good taste isnt dictated by colour ALONE ....I do know what I like to see and when it came to coordinating I seem to have done ok...but I did learn that no matter what I ALWAYS have to have a second opinion to just make sure and help me with what I am trying to do with regard to colour sceems etc.
I shop now and I either shop with a friend or ask for help now...I hate that I can't assume that I see it correctly. I hate that I have never seen the awesome colour of my daughter's eyes. I know they are green and everyone says they are very beautiful. I hate that I will never see the full affects of a rainbow. I only see parts of it. I guess I really hate the lack of control when it comes to what I see and being a woman it's something we take for granted untill we don't have it.
I have to say though ...I love that many things made sense after I found out I was colour blind that didnt make sense before. I know know the reason I could never remember all the trendy colour names my girl friends all knew. (brains don't register things it cant use lol) I know why I was so uninterested in the *Colouring portion of Hairdressing school......(thank god I always worked in salons back then that had a *COLOUR TECHNICIAN* I can just imagine the disasters waiting to happen there..BUT I DON'T SEE THE GREEN TINT IN YOUR HAIR MADAME!!!........................I also understand why I never really got the FALL colours AWE..I see that the leaves turn and I see some reds and oranges but I have never had that OMG look at that feeling like so many ppl I know. ...I am also thankful that my daughter can see ALL the colours and it has become a joke of sorts that she tells me the colour of things now. I am also gratefull thats its just COLOUR BLINDNESS I do realize that there are alot worse things to have been born with. I just have to vent about it sometimes lol...........and last but certainly not least, I love that it is part of my uniqueness and a good sourse of comic banter and jokes.
If anything I hope this has shed some small ray of colour or light onto what it can be like to be colour a woman anyway..I can't speak for all the men lol