Another short installment...It's her bday today..and I want to be the bigger person and wish her a happy bday...Why? Well..since our nail day, she hasn't called once...AND she didn't call last week for MY bday.
Not because she forgot....No, she actually tryed to get the sitter for saturday evening ..sat afternoon, she called at the sitters place but the sitter was here...sitters hubby called her here to inform her of her call so sitter called Liz to ask her when she needed her and Liz asked for that same night..sitter told her that she couldnt because I was out celebrating my bday till late.
She did NOT call me the next day on my actual bday either nor all this week. She even told the sitter the other day that she hadn't called on my bday.
I am still trying to wrap my head around how she can justify her pouting for something she herself did?!?....
The thing is...I bought her a bday gift 3 months ago...I know your thinking wtf lol....But I do that sometimes if I see exactly what would be perfect for a certain person...and wait till its their bday or xmas. SOOO
I had planned to be the bigger person and call her to wish her a happy bday....but do I dare go one step farther and actually give her the present?...Afterall...its not much good to someone else...and part of me selfishly hopes it makes her feel even worse ....I know its wrong but hey...I am still really hurt here....some may think giving a present to someone who hurt me ...STUPID and to a certain extent I agree...but I can also walk away knowing I was the bigger person...and it could also provoke her to THINK more then she obviously has been...about our friendship.
OR NOT... but IF not...thats ok too. I will have done the right think and know that it is aways the better choice. It can only help me in closing the door to that friendship and move on. Up till now it is still very painfully on my mind.
Tell me your thoughts and what u think...I really appreciated all the imput I got so far...much of it helped so much on so many levels...
3 comments:
I say give her the present - you know you'll feel better if you do and you're right, it does make you the better person. it could do one of two things:
1) it could fix things up between you guys
or
2) it could make her feel bad for being such a cow
Both look like positives to me, so go for it!
Hey Moon. Sorry i did not get right back to you tonight.
Your pal knows she did you wrong and it is guilt that is eating at her now. To deal with this, she is turning her discomfort towards you, blaming you for how she feels.
Hate to see friends throw away years of friendship. You can give it one last try to be heard.
In counseling, they tell you to use only "I" when you talk about your feelings. "i felt that my wedding did not matter to you when you did this" "I had waited so long to be a bride, and this bridal expo was a big deal to me" "I really needed the sitter to be there for ME that day".
Not saying YOU let me down. YOU should have known, might let her finally admit what she did to you, and hopefully allow your friendship, dented but still intact...to resume.
Good luck Moon. I love ya...Wish i lived closer, i would have helped ya.
Hugs hugs,
Scarlett
ok I don't know whats going on with the comment above mine but anyway... I agree with both Scar and Anna... give it one last go and tell her how you feel now and how you felt then and give her the present and I think it'll make ya feel better... if she still just doesn't get it... tell her to pull her fucking head out of her ass so she can realize that she has just lost the greatest friend she'll ever find... ;)
love ya hun *hugs*
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