Friday, September 03, 2004

Man verses Beast(A True Story)

Through the dawn of time, man has encroached apon natures habitat. It is a constant battle of war waged between man and beast. Cement skyscrapers replace majestic forests. Subdivisions replace meadows and fields. We as humans should be ashamed of ourselves. We as humans should rejoice in the pure and simple beauty of life. We as humans should beware of the revenge of the beast. Mark my words, it can happen. It happened to me.

This was never more true then a few weeks ago, here in my own yard. I have to share this story in warning to my fellow man. Stay vigilent and wary, you never know when they will stike.

It was a beautiful day out. One could not ask for better. The sun was shining with a warmth of comfort with a slight breeze to tickle ones skin. Birds were chirping and the distant sound of laughing children could be heard enjoying this fine summer day.

Perfect days like this were few and far between so I decided to spend my time outside on my deck. I set up my laptop on the patio table in order to get some things done yet still be outside. I was so immersed in typing something out that at first I didn't notice it. Then it happened again, the sound of something falling on the deck. Finally a third time it registered that pine nuts were falling from above. Yet still a forthought was logically tellling me that the slight breeze was responsible for them falling. When a fourth more insistant pine nut fell close to me on the deck I automatically looked up.

As my eyes focused, I was incredulous! Our gazes locked on eachother. Neither moving. You could hear a pin drop at that moment. Face to face I was not sure what to do. I could feel the tension, the anger, the wrath of the beast vearing its ugly head. Plotting his revenge against man on his territory by taking up arms he thought he could win. I remained steadfast and still, not daring to move. Unsure if he has anymore arsenal to use against me I held his gaze. Beeds of sweat broke out on my forehead. The back of my neck became tense. I knew the moment of confrontation was coming. I had to act no matter what.

I did what any self respecting person in my uncommon position would have done. Being faced with a pissed off squirrel standing on its hind legs with his chest all puffed up, hands on his waste and looking down at me from the roof of my house. I took a deep breath and let it out slowly then ...............I FLIPPED HIM THE FINGER! which made him turn and run.

The balance of man verses beast was restored yet again.


Squirrels said...

Moon, it wasn't me and I swear I didn't put him up to it. But it is to funny. I've had them chatter at me. LOL

Scroller said...

Ah moon, once again you paint a vivid picture with your words.
I agree that the beasts will take back what is theirs.
I have a friend here in BC. Yes I have a friend :P
Early one morning she let her dog out for its morning constitutional. Within seconds she heard her dog yelping in the back yard.
Running outside to see what was going on she came face to face with a raccoon. It was going for her dog so she grabbed it by the scruff of the neck.
She didnt know they had such a large amount of skin and such flexability. It spun around and bit her hand, just as she threw it into a garbage can. The crunching noise sent a shiver up her spine. She scooped up the dog and went in the house. To make a long story short.. She ended up with surgery to repair the tendons and the broken bones in her hand. She was off work for 2 months and is just coming back this week.
She tends to flip a finger at all raccoons now!

Anonymous said...

And I witness another successful try in your writing. Once again words find their path through you.
Glad you've found a way to put your writings into the world.

Write on!!


Shannon said...

What is it with the wildlife in Canada? I think they've broken into the Molsen's and are now finding some attitude!

And I betcha feel better flippin that innocent, defensless squirrel the bird don'tcha?

*walks away giggling her butt off*

~*Kris*~ said...


forget the out for the possums...they are always attacking me!

btw... you now have 200 times more hits than my company's website :)


Anonymous said...

she has 200 times more hits. Dang wenchie, ask moonie if you can post her picture at your company web page. ! LOL :)

reesie said...

mmmmmmmmmmm squirrel gravy and biscuits,,,*drools*