Thursday, February 23, 2006

Funeral Friendship

We went to a funeral service last evening. We didn't know the deceased personally but he was the brother of my good friends husband. He was a 52 yr old man who died after a 3 year fight with cancer. May he rest in peace.

Francine is a friend of atleast 20 years. We used to work together and had alot of fun doing it (usually when the forman wasn't looking lol). She is one of the few bilingual friends I have here actually. We have lived in different townships for the better part of the last 16 yrs. Although we don't see eachother often, we both know we are just a phone call away.

Last time I saw her was last year on my birthday actually when she surprised me with a visit. We have always keep eachother up on whats going on with the other but not overly much. We can go for months without calling but when we do, its for hours just gabbing away. We both know that the other will be there no questions asked if we need them.

The reason I am writing this is in light of my last two posts concerning a *friendship*. Odd how timing works...I lost (what I thought was a deep friendship) last week. To have something happen to bring home the fact of how precious this friend is.

It went without saying that we would go to the service just as a support from a friend to another regardless of knowing the person who passed or not. I was actually warmly surprised how happy she was to see me and Chris there. Her parents went to pay their respects but not one other of her friends showed up..and I am speaking of the ones she works with and are also geographically close to. That blows my mind.

She kept coming back to me when she could. I could tell it was the only times she could let her shoulders fall and relax. When she could just feel safe and speak freely.

During the priests service we listened to his monatone, insipidly droning voice recite a surman that sounded like he could just (incert any given name here). My friend took my hand and held it. I was so happy to be there for her. Not that her hubby wasn't, it was his brother after all that had passed, but he was surrounded by his grown kids and that was fine.

I was just so gratefull for the fact that my presense made a difference for her. That my man did not hesitate a second about me being there because she was my friend. (something my ex wouldn't have done) I was warmed by what the meaning of friendship is.

Friendship is so many things but it's not about what a friend can give you, it's what you being a friend can give them in return. That's what is so warming and special about friends.

I am not being very eliquent's hard to explain my feelings today. I am just glad to be a friend I guess lol.

Lastnight was a welcome feeling after last weekends disappointing friendship fiasco.


Rae said...

I'm glad that you could renew / revitalize your friendship with her... thats what friends are about...
knew everything would be ok hun...

*hugs* to you baby

Shannon said...

but but but......

Ya still got meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

(yeah I know...comforting thought)

I think that it is true what they say about when a door closes a window opens (and not for you to jump out neither...besides you have a one story house, you couldn't do that much harm to yaself if you did jump out that window).

Having someone do to you what she did I believe really teaches you (or reteaches) how to be a friend. Yanno, doing for someone else what you'd have done for you.

Yeah I'm babbling again...think you'd be used to it by now though....

Big hugs!